A catgirl's life

Post for May

2011-05-31T16:50:00.003-04:00

Well... it's time for another blog post. Been trying to update this thing more often, but I seem to never be able to find the time. Still, about once a month isn't too bad, and hopefully I'll be able to do two post next month.

Last semester ended pretty well. I had a A, B, B-, and C+ for the semester. Not as good as I would have like, but it was probably one of the best semesters I've had in a while. I give the credit to two things... One, only working one job, and two, doing a decent amount of socializing last semester.

The socializing part is kind of strange... But, I know if I don't get enough contact with people I end up feeling isolated and alone and that I should just stop trying and curl up into a little ball and stop doing things. Last semester between the group projects and being able to interact with people, I think I got the bulk of interaction needed to keep me sane. This semester though... with only 2 classes, one of which is online, kind of isn't allowing me to do things with people. Hopefully I can find some other way of not isolating myself and feeling like I'm a horrible person.

On a side note, I've been watching Babylon 5 on netflix. So far it's a pretty good show. The first season is kind of stupid, but the second and third seasons so far are enjoyable.

Anyway, I have course work to do, so I'll post sometime late. ~Night!

Glargh... Finals

2011-04-28T17:50:00.003-04:00

So... I just got done with finals... Well, not just done. I mean, I finished them up yesterday, but still. I kind of feel better about this semesters finals than I have at almost any other point in my academic career. I know that's not really saying much, but the extra time I had because I was only working one job helped a lot in the beginning. Only wish I could have stayed focused a little more near the end of the semester. Still, that lack of focus may have had more to do with all the projects being due at the end, though I will admit, some of it was because I missed some class. Not a lot, but 9am courses are hard to make it to when you didn't go to sleep until 3am the night before.

In an effort to try to get me to wake up earlier, I have decided to cut caffeine from my diet, starting yesterday after finals. I don't like staring up at my ceiling for an hour or two at night, waiting for sleep to come to me. And I think that might have been part of why I missed some of my morning classes this semester... Well, that and staying up late working on homework. So far, I'm randomly getting tired in the middle of the day, but that might just be because I've only been getting 3 hours of sleep a night this week (well, with the exception of last week, which I got something like 11 hours).

Anyway, My birthday came and went. I'm now 25! And at that day I felt like a good chunk of my life has passed me by. Still, I'm feeling a lot better since that day, partly because I think I passed all my classes, and partly because I've been trying to do stuff with friends.

Going to need to find an apartment. My lease ends at Pegasus Pointe at the end of July. Two of my friends are interested with rooming with me, so I'll see how that goes. Hopefully we'll be able to find a decent place.

Attended this year's megacon. That was pretty enjoyable. Though I don't think it was as good as previous years. Still, was good to see a convention again.

Anyway, I'm starting to ramble, and I keep having to correct my own typos, so I'm going to call it a night... ~Night!

Posting from the past, read in the present!

2011-03-17T16:01:00.003-04:00

This might be the first post I've done in a while where I wasn't emotionally off-kilter. I blame this getting caught up on sleep last night. Hopefully I'll stay this mentally clear for a while.

First, been working on a lot of school work. My game AI class is having me write up a pathfinding algorithm, and my Discreet Mathmatics class is having me program up a Deterministic Finite Automa machine (Also need to write a conversion from a NFA to a dfa as well...). Outside of class, I've been watching Battlestar Galatica, and I'm pretty close to finishing it. Have to say though, the remaining 5 cylons... kind of feel disappointed in their unrealistic choices. Still, it's a fantastic series.

Over Spring Break (which was last week), I spent most of it working or doing stuff for school projects. Still, I managed to get a game of Munchkin in with some friends of mine, and that was pretty cool. I don't know how many people know of Munchkin, but if you have a group of friends, I highly recommend playing it. Megan, Kira, Chris, and Megan's Boyfriend Lucas all got together and played. Pizza also was involved =).

Thinking about getting a three hole punch, a few binders, and printing out all of my previous blog entries. Truthfully, I use this less like a blog, and more like a diary/journal. On the off chance that google ever abandons blogger, I'd still like to be able to keep these entries, despite how melancholy most of them are. For me to do that, I need to print them all out...

I signed up for an online dating site about 3 weeks ago. A free one, though, aimed at furries. I'm kind of a borderline furry. I like the art, though a lot ofthe sexual focus, well, some of it is ok, but most of it is disturbing. Anyway, signed up with a dating site directed at this group, and I may have a potential date from it. It's a guy who goes to UCF who's into going to anime conventions. He seems to have similar interest to me, so who knows. If we get along well we may go to megacon together.

Anyway, that's about it at the moment. I'm going to go start working on other things. ~Night!

200th post

2011-02-25T23:39:00.003-05:00

Well... this is my 200th post to my blog. Wish it felt more monumentous.

Last week was my second with only one job. Was able to keep up with my readings, but I spent a little too much time on my 360. As such, I canceled my 360 gold account. Hopefully I'll be able to work on at least one of my side projects as well as class work, even if it's nothing more than one of the side stories I'm currently working on. Getting a side program done would be very nice. I almost feel as if my coding talents are slowly deteriorating.

Anyway, I know this was a short post, but I do need to get some sleep... ~Night!

Out With the Old

2011-02-06T22:43:00.003-05:00

Stupid January. Who would have thought you would have gone by so quickly. If feels like last week was New Years. Oh well...

So far, my desire to increase the amount I write is... intermittent. I am writing more than I was last year, but that's not saying too much. About twice a week I'll do an exercise from the writing exercise book I picked up, and maybe once a week I do some work on a sci fi story I'm writing. Outside of that, I haven't been working too much on non-work/non-school activities.

In order to help with the amount of non-school, non-work activities, and to help increase the amount of stuff I do for school, I am quitting my Orlando Job. My last day is Friday, February 11th. Currently I'm working 3 days a week there. When I did the math, I realized that I was driving more back and forth to the one here than I was to the job in my hometown. And since the job up here was all through city traffic, that means significantly more gas usage. I only wish I turned in my 2 weeks a week earlier, as I have a project due in a class at the start of next week, and I could have used the extra time this week for that project.

So far I'm staying up to date and on top of my classes. I feel like I'm slipping a little every week though, which is why I feel I need more time for courses. Still, I'm optimistic about this semester.

There were a few more things I had wanted to write, but a combination of IM chats and lolcat pictures have made me forget what it was I wanted to type, so ~Night!

Welcome in 2011

2011-01-16T15:03:00.002-05:00

Well, first let me welcome in the new year! I know that should have been something done on the first, but I've been caught between working and school, so I haven't had a chance to do so yet.

As for New Year's resolutions, I have a few of them. The first is to write more. To help with that resolution, I picked up a 365 writer exercise book... One exercise per day. I've managed to stay up to date with it, but I left it at my dorm, so a day here or there I haven't done the exercises. My second resolution is something I've had no luck in so far. I hope to find someone to have a meaningful, romantic relationship with. Not sure how much luck I'll have with that, but...

Well... I didn't do too well in AI, but I wasn't expecting to. There's only so much you can do with a full class load, and work. Especially considering I didn't have a day off from both school and work until I was already struggling...

Anyway, I need to get going... Have random bs things I need to get done... so ~Night!

Left Without Roommate

2010-12-19T23:36:00.003-05:00

Well, I said yesterday that I would write up a blog today, and so here it is!

As mentioned, my roommate left. After my roommate left, I just sat on the couch for fifteen minutes, staring off into space. I don't know if Mintz (roommate's last name) and I were that close, but that does not prevent me from feeling lonely/saddened over it. I mean... I enjoyed our conversations, which ran the gamut of things happening locally to talks on mutual friends to discussions on economics and politics. I enjoyed the two of us swapping books all the time, and for that to be over is well... it makes me feel that a chapter has closed in my life. Sure, I still have Mintz's email and facebook info, but I no longer have direct contact, and it has been my experience with friendship that once direct contact is lost, friendships slowly fade away.

Anyway, that's pretty much it for tonight. I could write more, but I have work in the morning, and I want to get at least seven hours of sleep, so ~Night!

Another Notch on the Post Count

2010-12-19T00:18:00.002-05:00

Well... the last month went by fast. In fact, I can pretty much say this entire year has been traveling at a break neck speed. It seems like a few days ago when I made my last post...

Finals have gone and went. I know I did not do well in my AI course, but since it is an elective, I am not too worried about it. I can always replace it with another elective, one that actually has relevance outside of academia (I'm considering database design to replace this one). I know I did well on my Interactive Graphics Course (gah, that had like... 15 hours of homework a week, all high end C++ coding =(.) I'm concerned about my system software course, but my Object Oriented Processes course I'm sure I did well in (And, I need to do well in, since it's one of the courses UCF demands me have a 2.5gpa in or better).

I am heavily considering dropping myself down to a part time student, and working full time. I don't think I can handle another semester where 3 of my classes (Graphics, OOP, and System Software) have 15+ hours of homework a piece a week on top of what I work. Until I took a month long sabbatical from my job in Orlando, I felt completely burnt out, with general feelings of depression and loneliness. Loneliness because I spent a good deal amount of time alone, working on crazy project things, and depression because, no matter what I did, I felt like I kept on missing key concepts of the classes. In fact, for about the first week of November/last week of October, I kind of gave up on everything and just spent what time I had curled up on my bed, feeling like a complete failure when I wasn't working. Taking the time off one of my jobs helped a lot, and I did get things done. Not as much stuff done as I would have like, but better than nothing.

Anyway, I want to get to sleep for work tomorrow. After work, I should post another blog about my roommate moving out on Friday, so ~Night!

BSG

2010-11-23T02:07:00.002-05:00

Been watching some of the new(ish) Battle Star Gallatica episodes. I must say, it's like someone created a twisted, underhanded soap opera series and placed it on a space ship. Would like there to be a little bit more romance to it, but outside of that I am enjoying it heavily... Maybe a little too heavily, as one night I stayed up till 7am watching episodes. I'm watching this on netflix, in case anyone is wondering how I'm viewing it.

Just realized I don't talk too much about my friends on this blog. I spend most of my time in front of a computer screen, doing solitary activities like writing, reading (for those two things both academic and for pleasure), and occasionally gaming. I don't exactly know why that is. I enjoy time with my friends more than almost any other thing I could be doing (well, except reading certain books, but those books are few and far between, yet... I don't know. It just never feels like my schedules correspond to that of everyone else I know. I'm either working weekends, or in class, or at my other job. And so, some days, I feel like I'm completely isolated from the world I know. But, if I'm honest, it's probably because I don't make as much an effort to expand my friend base and to try to keep in touch with the people I know through means other than steam/In game chat, etc. And now I'm 24, and find out that my life revolves around a small group of people, and I'm afraid that group will only shrink. To top that off, I don't see of any way to stop being single. And out of everything, that depresses me.

Anyway, I've gotten sidetracked from this blog post (just spent the last hour online with a friend as they tried to find out as much info about me from nothing but my screen names.) That kind of derailed my thinking, and now I want sleep. So ~Night!

My second post in the same month \o/

2010-11-15T12:58:00.004-05:00

Yes, the \o/ is required in the title.

This post is not so much to cover what happened between today and Saturday, it is more to cover everything between now and the previous post in September...

As I have said, I have taken a month long sabbatical from my job up here in Orlando. I'm hoping that such a break will allow me to catch up on my school work, and maybe my writing and independent programming, though I doubt I would be able to catch up on anything more the former (though, maybe a few additional blog posts). I make enough money, barely, from my job back with my parents to pay for my food, car insurance and possible car maintenance, and to make payments to my credit cards. Not much more though, so I'm hoping that nothing goes horribly wrong financially with me.

I am worried about my parents. The station is breaking even... and not much else. Also, the bank is trying to force a refinancing of the station. Technically, it is at a lower rate, but they want to make it from the current 20 year loan to a 5 year loan, meaning a net increase of payments. Not too sure what my folks can do against that. Then my dad also went independent. Although he's doing more trades per month, the group he's processing his trades with are giving him a lower commission, and taking more out for his medical insurance, resulting in a significantly less paycheck per month. My mom is worried he may do something drastic...

On a positive note, I got the 500 dollar deductible from my car accident back in August (ya, it took that long.) Since I've been looking at ereaders for the last year plus (since the release of the Kindle 2), I used some of that money to purchase a Nook (the rest I used to pay off debts I owed). So far I'm really liking the device, and I really love the eInk screen. The interface is a little... slugish though. Though my primary reason for picking it up wasn't book reading. My zune died about four weeks ago, and my car's CD player died about two weeks ago. Since I'm in my car more than I am in class/at one of my jobs, I thought picking up something to play music might be worthwhile.

I'm considering writing some sort of scifi/pulpy story thing. I would try to update it weekly if I did. Still undecided on it though.

Anyway, I need to log. Have some homework that needs doing.

November's Post!

2010-11-13T23:56:00.004-05:00

Well... it's been a while since my last post =(. Been fairly busy with school, work, and minecraft (ok, the last one is not a legitimate excuse, but it still is something I've been busy with).

I can not say school is going as well as I would like it to. I do not think I am doing too well in System Software course, or in my AI course. System software because I keep devoting time from that class to Graphics, and AI because it's in Lisp, which is a horrible programming language, and I can not find an interpreter for that that will run on any OS made since 98. Overall, I don't know how well I'm going to do this semester.

In an effort to do better, I've requested a month off from my Orlando job in the hopes that I can catch up. Though, I return to work a week before finals start. Hopefully that won't be as bad as I think it will be...

I'm going to try to write more. At least, based up anecdotal evidence and my own, skewed opinion, I have full faith that I do better academically and in a working environment when I write. By write I mean anywhere from blogposts to fiction to overly gothy/emo poetry that makes people question my mental state. I'm hoping that the writing will help me get through this semester... Instead of blowing up in my face and resulting in less productivity.

Anyway, I know it's a short post, but I do need to get some sleep. So ~night!

A long, rambling post about rambling things

2010-09-12T00:29:00.003-04:00

Wow... 5 comments! Sure, 3 of them are spam, but the other 2...

Ya... In 4 months I have not manged to add to the story thing I was/am writing. Still, I have a few things written for it, so I'll post the first section after the long winded rambling section of my blog. Please note that it's not even in the rough draft category yet, so it is not that great. I have a decent amount of it planned though, so at least I will not be flying blind with it. Hopefully I can stop being lazy and actually finish it one day... along with all those random programming projects of mine. I will make it a different color though, so it is easier to find.

So.... four months have past. A lot of things happened. Well... I would at least like to think a lot of things happened.

The biggest event to have occurred in that time frame was my car accident. The accident occurred on the first of August, while I was driving down to a Kira's place to play a round or two of Munchkin with her, Megan, and Thomas. A person turned in front of me, and I slammed on my breaks to avoid hitting him. Unfortunately, the person behind me was not as able a driver as I, and he rear ended me (I was almost completely stopped). The damage to my vehicle was enough to total it. I missed a week's worth of work due to not having a vehicle, and the guy's insurance (eSurance) still has not reimbursed my insurance company for the reckless damage of my vehicle.

It was not a fun event. I think the worst part about the event though, was that it was MY vehicle that got totaled. My vehicle, paid in total with my funds (as opposed to the Station Wagon I drove at one point, which was a combination of my funds and my parent's funds). I mean... I'm not one of those gear heads who could tell you the stats of their vehicle, or freaks out if the windshield gets smudged. But it was more than a vehicle with the amount I drive. A good part of my time each week was spent in that vehicle. Some weeks it was more time spent in my old Volvo than I spent waking hours in my dorm. In a year I put something like 40k miles on the car (Ok, might have been closer to 25k, since I got it at 80k in Feb of 09, and lost it at 130k miles on Aug 1st, but that is still a lot of time spent behind the wheel). I mean, it was less of a vehicle, and more of a home. I felt safe in it. I felt comfortable. It was my world in there... and now it's gone. All because some person couldn't pay attention to the god damn road.(And yes, I'm physically uninjured... Just taking this more personally than is probably healthy to do).

I'm currently driving the Camry. It was what I was driving before the Station Wagon. Ended up buying it from my sister with the check my insurance gave me after the accident. It just... doesn't feel the same as the Volvo I guess. It doesn't feel like my vehicle. It isn't my car. Well... I guess legally it is my car, but it doesn't feel like it. It was initially my parent's car, and that's what it feels like. With regard to transportation, I feel that I am once again entirely beholden to family, and at their whim and mercy. I know that is not the case, at least logically I know that, but... Anyway, Christine (the sister I bought the Camry from) used the money to make a down payment on an Aveo...

I ended up canceling my EvE Online subscription again... this time to do something that doesn't eat up so much of my life. Truthfully, I think MMO's in general give me a dose of melancholy. Not anything to do with their mechanics or how they operate, but because I tend to go overboard when playing MMO's (or at least when playing EvE), and spend an ungodly (like 20) number of hours in the game each week. I think I need to be around people to be happy. Actual, physical people. And as realistic or immersive or interesting they make an MMO, that part still is not there. So I end up feeling like some sort of shallow, empty shell when playing them for long periods of time. Well, that and I also feel significantly less productive when I play an MMO. I mean a sense of real productivity. Not the hallow feeling for gaining a random level or building a fake object. Still, if I could discipline myself to spend no more than ten hours a week on an MMO, I would probably go back to it.

The thing I'm doing instead of an MMO? NetFlix. It's pretty cool. Not the getting movies mailed to you via snail mail. But the whole being able to stream their collection straight to your PC is cool. Sat down and started watching a TV series on Netflix called Sanctuary. It's pretty good... Though it has some fairly large-ish or weird-ish plot holes and things that just don't seem to add up. Still, it's an enjoyable diversion every once in a while.

I ended up getting B's in both of my Summer classes. That made me feel pretty well... or maybe pretty swell... or maybe just a general, vague sense of accomplishment/pride. Yes... I know. It was only 2 classes. But damnit, it was the first semester that I was "Full Time" and that I passed all my classes (2 classes over the summer is full time, as opposed to the standard 4 classes in fall/spring).

This semester though, my load is a little heavier than it was in recent semesters. I'm taking a System Software course, a Process and Design course (ie, the process of making software), an Introduction to Artificial Intelligence, and a course on Graphics Rendering in OpenGL (curse you spell checker! OpenGL is not misspelt!). The AI course and the Process and Design course are both... well... I'm not sure how to describe them, except that I do not look forward to attending the rest of those classes.

I took a look at the miniatures wargame Warmachine, and I have to say, it looks pretty cool. Going to try to get into it with an elf army (err... Retribution of Scyrah army), since very few people play that at the local game store. To sum up the game real quick, it's mages controlling steam powered warmachines that wail against each other.

Anyway, I need to call it a night. But before I do, see below for the opening sequence thingy. Anyway, ~Night!

Chapter 1:
Valnerstadt. Last trade city of the north. Its buildings towering over the cobbled stoned streets below, blocking out what weak sunlight could penetrate the thick clouds overhead. To the east lay the Issen river, winding along the city's west side like a python constricting its prey. Its deep, murky waters teeming with boats and barges carrying goods to and from the more pleasant Southlands.
The warehouse area was subdued. Workers and townsfolk were intentionally avoiding the area, giving two people plenty of room. ---NOTE TO SELF:: ADD MORE HERE::---
“Care to explain to me why one of your clerks were found here, Helios?” came Valner's voice.
Helios looked down at the cobbled stones beneath them and saw what was left of one of his clerks. The body had been savaged by animals, and what remained was a horrid sight. Its throat had been violently ripped out, and parts of it had been been torn and rent, till it was barely recognizable as human. The face remained though, but around it blood had pooled. It had thankfully frozen over sometime in the night, but the frozen crimson contrasted sharply with the cobblestones beneath.
“I assume the torn throat made it somewhat difficult for him to be found elsewhere, High Valner.” Helios responded.
“And what was he doing that would have gotten his throat torn out?” the Steward asked.
“Probably going home after a drink, I'd wager. During his stroll home, he fell, froze over, and became food for the animals that roam your streets.” Helios replied.
“Would you then please explain why the only men to have been victim to animal attacks in the past 3 months were your clerks, Helios? And also elaborate on how there can be so many stray animals in the city to present the Artificer's Consortium such problems, yet not be seen by the guards?”
“My Most High, I have people looking into it as we speak, and I am sure I can give you an answer-”
Valner's stern voice cut the Consortium member's reply short. “May I remind you that it is my duty, as Steward, to defend and protect the people of this city, and if that means replacing clerks who can not do their job adequately, then I shall send a request for a replacement to the chapter in Arine Proper.”
The steward looked over the grizzly remains, his tone softening. “Honored Helios, I have been Steward of this city for as long as you have been alive. In that time I have made mistakes that have cost uncountable lives. I will not make those mistakes again. I have no desire to involve an outside chapter of the Consortium, but if it is warranted, I will bring in an outsider to run your chapter. If another clerk of yours dies by animal attack, it will happen.”----NOTE TO SELF::FINISH THIS SCENE AND MAKE IT TIE INTO NEXT SCENE::----"

slash emo...

2010-05-12T00:17:00.004-04:00

Well... I am now the least educated person in my family. This past weekend, my 2 younger sisters graduated with their 4 year degrees. So now my dad and my sisters each have 4 year degrees, and my mother has an AA with some certificates. Leaving me at the bottom with only an AA. Though... I guess if you were to consider number of years in school, and number of scholarly books read, I'd be in first place... though that doesn't make me feel much better.

I guess I'm probably the black sheep in the family. I apparently take forever at school, can not find a date to save my life, and am the anitsocial person in my family. On top of that, I'm probably the one who is least likely to succeed. I mean... both the jobs I hold I have only because of family ties. Catherine got a job with one of the mid-western universities, and Christine was a member of enough student organizations to constitute at least one non-family job. Me though... the last job interview I had didn't even have a call back.

I know I shouldn't be so emo... I know I should be happy for my sisters... I mean, I'm not angry or upset with them or anything like that. It's just that I am extremely disappointed in myself and my own incompetence. I *should* have a 4 year degree now... I should be independent of my family now. I should be engaging in my own life, having at least some sort of romantic interest, and maybe doing something of importance. Instead, I feel like I'm the poster child for mediocrity and ineptitude. And the worst part of it all is... I only have one person to blame, and that's myself.

I did quit EvE Online again. At least I have some willpower. I made the decision about 2 weeks before finals. I don't know how much it helped my final exam grades, but I did pass both my classes. I don't think I'll go back to EvE Online anytime soon though, not because the game isn't fun, but because I want to do more with my life than virtual space ships.

For the last few... months? weeks? Year? I've been working on a novel... thing. I'm only putting a few hours into it per month, though since I've made the conscious to lower my video game addiction traits thingy, I've been working on it a little more. Also been working on some short stories as well. When I get something finished, or a chapter written on the novel thing, I'll post it here. Until then though, it'll be TOP SECRET!!!!!!!!! (Ok, the exclamation marks weren't necessary, but the capitalization was).

On a minor side note, I'm now 24... Which makes all I wrote above even more depressing...

Finally, Ryan... turned down? rejected? denied? my offer to date each other. Said something about being bipolar, and stress, and how those two things don't mix well with relationships. I don't know how true that statement was with him, but he was the most recent thing I had to the potential of... something more meaningfull than friendship. Been 3? years since I last went on a date. So... now I'm kind of emo about it.

Anyway, I have work tomorrow morning, and I need to find a way to figure out how to fund my summer classes since I might not be able to get a federal loan, so ~Night!

More than 09

2010-04-06T00:24:00.003-04:00

Well... this post should officially put me at more posts this year than last... which is either a good thing, or it means I was a lazy bum last year when it came to writing. I have a sneaking suspicion that it is the later, and not the former. Still... I've been trying to write a little more this year than last, and I even kind of have a story/book thing in the works. Once I get an actual chapter written, and not the tons of random, semi-connected sections I currently have, I'll post the chapter here.

Anyway... Didn't really have too much to post outside of that. Will try to add another post maybe tomorrow... Well... I did finish reading A Feast For Crows by George RR Martin, and that was a great book... and tomorrow brings the next dresden files book... and I have the most recent Mercy Thompson book on my shelf that needs reading.... gah! Too many books to read!!!!

Also, thinking about asking Ryan out... or at least if he's single. I'm just afraid that doing so might be a mistake. I don't know... I really don't have much experience in the realm of romance. Hell... I don't have a lot of experience in the realm of dealing with people in general, which is one of the major regions I'm a CS major (decided to change majors back at the end of 09) and not something that requires more person to person contact (ie, psychology or sales or something.) On the one hand, he's kind of cute, and he doesn't like apple products, and he's fun to hang around. On the other hand, he seems some what immature...ish. Not in conversation per se... but in his listings of priorities, his understanding of things like history and personal economics, and things like that... though, to be fair, I seem to have an issue prioritizing as well, otherwise I'd have already gotten my 4 year degree, and not be about to start my 6...ish year.

Still... I want someone to be able to hold me. I want to be with someone, love someone, and try out some of the things in some of the... ummm.... fiction I've read with someone. Yet... I don't know. I know waiting around for the right person would be a major mistake, I'm just afraid that choosing the wrong person would be a mistake as well... And also, if he had any interest in me, he'd probably ask me out or something by now. The last thing I'd want to do is to ask him out, find out he's not interested, then have things be awkward between the two of us. I don't really have a lot of friends, and I have no wish of loosing one.

Anyway, I have to be up in six and a half hours for work... so ~Night!

EvE: Dominion

2010-03-05T22:39:00.005-05:00

Well... I have done something horrible... I have renewed my Eve Online subscription. Since my Eve Online renewal, my productivity in my classes have gone noticeably down. So, I either need to significantly cut back on Eve, or re-quit it all together.

Parents took me to go see Wicked on Sunday. It was pretty entertaining, though it's nothing like the book. I would go so far as to say the book's plot, and the play's plot, have almost nothing in common. But the music is very enjoyable, and the costumes were well done. But I do feel sorry for my sister, who was sitting next to me in the theater and had to put up with the occasional exasperated arm waving when things were too different.

Ryan and I have grabbed a few lunches together (well... 2). He's kind of cute, and he's smart. Just... more book smart's and applications of logic smart, and not so much application of history smart or common sense smart. (Yes, that's right, I've expanded the types of smart from 2 to 4!). I mean, if he's grabbing food with me, that means he at least likes listening to my random rants and raves about the world, right? Like... we grabbed lunch today at a pizza place on campus, and we talked for about an hour and a half, till I had to call it quits to get back to my dorm (So I could get ready to help out my Boss with some work related things, but that got canceled). He seems nice enough... though he can be a little apathetic...

Anyway, I need to get my stuff packed to head off to my parent's for the weekend, and maybe part of spring break. I'll try to write another post when I have more time... ~Night!

I hate being sick

2010-02-23T00:20:00.002-05:00

Well... just got over being sick. It was more like a 48 hour head cold then anything serious, but still annoying. Overstuffed nose, headaches, sore throat, constant tiredness, and random cold/hot flashes. Actually missed class because of it (instead of a random skip of class). Still, I'm glad I'm feeling better now.

Going to try a few new things with my finances. Set up a second checking account because SunTrust is offering up to 150 dollars if you set up a new checking account with them and do online bill pay. Going to try to divide my funds into 2 accounts... one for bills and one for misc. The new Suntrust account will be for bills, while my old account will for misc things, since I also have my old account linked to my savings account to allow easy transfer into savings. I also plan on doing one or two other things with my old checking account, though I'm not going to get into it to I enact those ideas.

There's this kind of cute guy in my CS2 class. He hates macs almost as much as I do. His name's Ryan. Been talking with him before the last 2 classes... Maybe I can finally stop being single?

Glargh, my brain isn't up to the complex task of writing a blog at the moment... so ~Night!

Happy Make single people feel worse than normal day

2010-02-14T00:35:00.004-05:00

I do not like Valentines day. It's not anything against the day in general. In fact, I love the idea of romance, of being able to have a day where I could be close to a person I love, spend time with them, give and receive gifts, and all together feel cherished. The problem with Valentines day is, I have yet to have a Valentines day come out like that. I have never seen this holiday without being single. So I end up seeing a bunch of happy couples, and television and the internet is full of ads for happy couples, and what to get him/her ads, and such things. So, not only do I end up feeling left out, I end up looking back at my life, seeing my long, single, loneliness, and feeling like some sort of human defect for my inability to find a guy to be with. It's not the worst feeling in the world, but it doesn't help.

I need to start stabilizing my sleep schedule. Right now, between work and class, I'm alternating between waking up at 11, and waking up at 7, and going to sleep between 11 (this time pm) and 3 (this time am). It leaves me feeling tired the entire week, and I don't think that's a good thing. Especially because I have, on at least 1 or two equations, overslept my 1:30pm class. So I need to start stabilizing the time I go to sleep. May try to do it at 11:30pm, but that would involve me missing the Colbert Report, and it is one of two shows I deem worth watching (the other being the Daily Show). Yet if I don't do something about it, well, I'll probably just end up feeling worse. (The other issue is trying to go to sleep at that time on the weekends. Some nights I don't even get off of work until 11:30...)

Need to also start focusing more on my writing, and on my independent programing projects. Both have fallen by the wayside (curse you Modern Warfare 2 and Sins of a Solar Empire! Curse you both for your hours of pointless, yet entertaining... enterainingness.) So I need to look into doing more of the programming and writing, and less of the gaming (I'd also include NetFlix in that less than, but after getting over the initial How awesome it is, I really only watch about 2 hours of movies a week.)

Anyway, that's all I have at the moment. So ~Night!

UCF...ness

2010-01-31T14:29:00.003-05:00

Well... I wanted one last post for January 2010, so I guess this will be it. Though, given that today is the last day of the month, I would find it extremely difficult to add another post this month.

Been holding off on buying one of my textbooks for class. I'm not the type of person who refuses to buy books. In fact, I'm probably in the opposite category. But... when a book costs 150, its for 1 semester, and it doesn't seem to have much use out side of the the class it's for, I have a problem buying the book. I mean... if I was planning to go into research and the like, it would be a good book to own. Though, with the way the class has been going, I may need to pick it up as a substitute to the course. Not that the teacher is bad, just that I may need something better to study off of then my notes and the teacher's original slides... especially since I tend to be a little fuzzy on some of the stuff from Comp Sci 1. (The course the book is for is Comp Sci 2).

Truthfully though, I don't know if I like the current setup of colleges. The programs are all designed around the idea that the students have large blocks of free time in the middle of the day. Classes are often overcrowded, taught by teachers who are more interested in research then teaching. Not that research is a bad thing. Still though, there should be more efficient ways of doing higher education... or at least, higher education for people who work 2 jobs. This semester, I was trying to schedule my classes in such a manner that would allow me to work 40+ hours a week... even only taking 2 classes it was almost impossible. And, to make matters worse, all but 1 class offered in the Computer Sciences program was before 5pm, but after 9am. I mean... how is a person suppose to hold a what many people call a normal job while in school, when schooling isn't setup to allow it? A better model, or at least, a more accessible model, would be something like a subscription set up for classes. Pay a monthly fee, get unlimited web access to online material, and so many hours access to in-person TA's and professors, while, to receive credit for a class, you pay an extra fee to either take a comprehensive exam, or pay a fee to submit a paper/project thing. But... I guess I'm just babbling now.

I think I need to get out more. Just seems I'm going stir crazy in my dorm. Though, most of the people I know in the Orlando area seem to be busy with either class or work =(. Still, I should probably consider joining a school club or something... though the last time I joined one I really didn't feel like I fit in with it too much. Still... may rejoin it, since odds are the old officers of the club are no longer involved.

Anyway, I have an assignment to finish up... and I may start looking into devoting more time to being at the UCF library for study purposes... but anyways, ~Night!

Brakes.... Just Don't

2010-01-19T22:35:00.003-05:00

Well... apparently brakes break. Yesterday I went to have new brake pads installed on my vehicle, only to find out that (according to the mechanic) my rotors on my brakes are beneath factory specified levels. I ended up having to get the rotors replaced, which, although I budgeted 140 for my brakes, it ended up costing me 340. So now I need to save up 250 by January 31st so I'll have enough money to pay rent. Guess I won't be picking up any more books for a while.

Probably also need to continue putting money away for car insurance as well. I believe my 6 months of insurance is up in March, which will mean that I will need 500 dollars by the end of March, so it seems I'll have no money in February or March as well... And then I'll probably have to do a tax payment as well. Stupid finances...

Been trying to write some fiction, though that's not progressing as fast as I would like... though that may be because I'm not writing as often as I would like. It's not that I don't enjoy writing (if I didn't, I probably would have deleted this blog a few years ago), just... when I want to relax, banging my head against writer's block isn't my idea of doing so. Though, I would probably experience less writer's block if I wrote more often, then what I currently do.

Going to work on some writing, and maybe wast some time... ~Night!

EDIT: Stupid google and needing me to close my /span tag...

First day of semester

2010-01-11T17:06:00.002-05:00

Well, it's the first day of the semester. Currently only signed up for 2 classes, though considering signing up for a third before the end of Add/Drop. Currently taking Comp Sci 2 and Discrete Structures (again).

I think I really need to start looking for another place to live. Not that I don't like my dorm, but an apartment would be more permanent. Also, depending on how I could get rooming to work, it may be cheaper then my dorm. Currently pay 480 a month at my dorm. It's not too bad, but considering that I share my dorm with 3 other people, if I can find a 2 room apartment for 700, divided between 2 people would be 350, a full 130 less a month than I'm currently paying (though I'd have to provided the utilities). A new place also has the benefits of not having random inspections, then getting a notice of not being in compliance because we have unwashed dishes in our sink.

I also seriously need to look into getting either a second part time job here in Orlando, or a full time job and quitting both the job with my parents and my Orlando job. Though, that will be harder than it seems, since apparently the UCF only places CS classes in the middle of the day. One of the reasons I'm only taking 2 classes is because the other classes I could take would end up preventing me from being able to work. I mean, seriously, shouldn't school work with in my schedule, and not the other way around? In fact, I could go on a huge rant on how the university system currently works... but I currently lack the time for it.

Also, decided to create the (preliminary) stuff for my own software company. Linky here! I'll need to save up some funds to pay the LLC cost so I can be my own company. The main driving factor in this is so I can write off all the programming and tech books I buy, but if I do sit down and create a game, well, this would be my springboard to do it.

Anyway, I need to log. ~Night!

Blorg

2010-01-06T00:23:00.002-05:00

Yes, Blorg is a word. I don't care what spell check's opinion is on Blorg.

Christmas went... ok I guess. Spent it with family, though I spent the week of Christmas working. Pulled about 55 hours in that week, though technically it was divided amongst 2 pay weeks (stupid Wednesday being the divider day). Did get a new set of tires on my vehicle for Christmas, so that made me happy, though I was kind of unhappy that day since my father decided that the family should spend Christmas day at Bush Gardens... I mean, seriously, why?

Sorry... started writing this Tuesday Night, but ended up going to sleep. Now it's Friday, and I haven't had a chance to do anything on this blog...

New Year's Eve went well. Jury duty for me got canceled (was scheduled for it at 9:00am on 12/31/09, but the automated message number I had to call stated that all jurors were relieved of duty on the 31st), so that was good. Ended up taking apart my 360 that day, since it had stopped showing video and was a year or two out of warranty. Ended up finding a capacitor on the board that was damaged, which is where I'd place the most likely cause of the problem (though I'm surprised that that's only interfering with the video).

Afterwards, I had a few friends over for some gaming and game-related video watching to celebrate the New Year's. Kira didn't come since she had plans for Sea World. Tim (this boy I've been flirting with since Jacon, though only really over phone and steam) got called into work. But Chris and Ryan showed up, and we even had a round or two of Brawl going on (Chris has a wii... my sisters have a copy of Brawl that they let me borrow). Felt nice to have friends over, especially after having to spend the week of Christmas with my family. I do love them, but somehow they always manage to raise my stress level by about 700%. The Sunday before I was suppose to leave back for Orlando... well... I wasn't a person you would have wanted to talk to.

Also, if you haven't checked out Unskippables, and you like Mystery Science Theater 3000, then you owe it to yourself to view it. Also, another good thing that website does... worth the watches.

Thinking about starting up my own game company thingy. Largely to act as a tax shelter for my love of purchasing programming and game design books, but also to actually produce a game. Currently mulling over how to do an Escape Velocity Nova clone-type-ish thingy game. I would write it in XNA, with the target platform being the 360, even though I currently don't have a working 360 (yes, I see the flaw in that plan). I'd also write it using XNA for how easy it would be to port it to the computer, and vice-a-versa. Been learning XNA through some books I have (in fact, I may have too many books, not just XNA but in general... or not a large enough bookshelf. There's one foot of clearance between my bookshelf and the ceiling, so maybe I could put more books there...) and so far I'm liking how easy it is to do media... though writing up something to do typing in that game looks like it'll be a PAIN IN THE ASS!!!... at least until I write up some sort of library for it.

You know... it feels good to have an actual direction. Anyway, ~Night!

Sunrises

2009-12-26T23:37:00.003-05:00

Well... I have decided I dislike sunrises. Not because of the sunrise themselves... in fact, I think most sunrises are pretty. No, my main reason for disliking them is because, if I see a sunrise, it normally means I've either stayed up too late, or woke up to early, and that I have a LONG day ahead of me. For example... saw a sunrise this morning and pulled a 14 hour (really need to stop my habit of putting 14h for 14 hour... EvE online has ruined all time abbreviations for me) work load today. So... I'm going to collapse into blissful unconsciousness, and post about Christmas and winter break tomorrow... ~Night!

Also, as a side note... I love firefox's automatic spell checking abilit

A new oppurtunity

2009-12-16T01:57:00.003-05:00

Well... back in November, well, around November 25th-ish, I placed an application in at UCF for a programming position they had opened. I received a call from their HR department asking me if I'm still interested in the job. I told them yes, and I'll have a job interview on January 5th.

The position is for label "programmer" and is suppose to be a full time, Monday through Friday, job. Though, when I told the woman I was talking to on the phone that I'm still a UCF student, she said their may be an issue with me working full time with the school and taking classes, though it may be possible. If not, she said if I passed the interview I could at least work part time. In the very least, if I get the part time side, I can quit the job with my parents. If I could get a full time job, I could cut down my other job here in Orlando to a weekend and maybe some time after work.

I want to say I'm happy about this. I want to say I'm ecstatic. But... a part of me is also afraid of switching jobs. I know the status quoe isn't the best thing, especially when you're unhappy with life, but the unknown is also not a good thing, especially when you're about to try to be independent from your parents, and that hope rests on a job you haven't gotten yet. I'm also afraid that, even though I know I can program, and even though I have experience in C, C++, VB.Net, Java, HTML, and CSS (not all of it great experience, but still I could figure out how to write stuff in it given a book, a half hour, and a task), I'm afraid I might not be able to meet the job requirements. The last thing I want to do is quit my current job, get hired at UCF, then 3 weeks later get let off due to inability to perform duties. Yet on the same token, I also don't want to stay at my current job... but my current job is a stable (albeit annoying) source of income... But this new job promises to pay 4 dollars more an hour... It just... it's just confusing.

Kira had a Christmas party on Sunday night, and I was invited. I arrived late due to driving from work back in Bradenton (coming to Altamonte), and I had a decent time. I think that, combined with me restarting this blog, has resulted in me feeling a little better then I did at last post, though it may also be because I don't have any class until possibly the 11th. Or it may just be because I have some sort of chemical imbalance, and the chemicals I need just happen to be in ham and pecan pie. Though I don't think that last one is it. Did meet a cute guy there named Alex, but I guess he's currently Kira's friend with benefits, and I don't really want to get involved in her (Kira's) love life. That would just be kind of creepy. Ok, not just kind of...

Debating between taking the Foundations Exam on Friday or not. Haven't studied for it, so I probably shouldn't take it. But there's no penalty to failing it, so I have nothing to loose but the 3 hours it takes. Still, it's on a Friday, and that time could be spent traveling back to my parents... where I'll be stuck at till the 31st, since I have Jury Duty that day. I'll probably sign up for it tomorrow...

Anyway, I really need to log. It does feel good though being able to have a place again to write all my emo stuff, so I don't spend my days sitting there being emo, and instead only spend 30 or 40 minutes ranting about how, although I have decent friends and family, I can't somehow be happy. Anyway, ~Night!

I believe I hate school

2009-12-13T01:20:00.005-05:00

I changed my major at UCF from Computer Engineering to Computer Science. I really want to do programming, and not the electrical/hardware side of computers, so it was probably the best decision I could make regarding my academic career. I don't know yet if it'll matter though, since I'm technically on Academic Probation (gee... working 2 jobs, one of them on the opposite side of the state, and trying to juggle a full course load, just doesn't work for some reason), and I use the word "technically" because, after this semester, I don't know if I'll still even be allowed in the Computer Engineering/Computer Science program. Don't think I did too well in my classes this semester (well, one class, the other 2 I think I placed a C or higher), but if my gpa doesn't average out to a 2.0, well... it won't be good academically. Not that anything I do is good academically. It also doesn't help that my student loans come due at the end of the spring semester. And since my college career is pretty much dead in the water, well...

I'm going to need to find a job in Orlando. A real one. That I can work full time. Preferably something technical. Then, maybe, I can take a night class each semester. Assuming I haven't messed things up too much. I mean... I really wish I didn't screw things up as much as I did. Maybe if I chose my own job, and handle my own financial stuff rather then let my parents talk me into letting them handle it, I might have been better off. Or maybe if I chose a different dorm for my first year. Or maybe if I was more social, I wouldn't spend my free time trying to distract myself from feeling like I'm worthless... Though, now I pretty much feel like I've left everyone I know down. I feel like one giant failure, and this is made worse by the fact that my sisters will both be graduating with their BA degrees come mothersday. And me? I'm going to be lucky if I can find some job to be able to keep myself in college. And the worst part? Maybe it would be better to do one final failure instead of a perpetual life of failures...

Getting away from the gloom of how my classes are going, I joined a writer's group in Orlando (well, technically Altamonte). Just something to be social with twice a month. I met the people at the local Barnes And Nobels (I'm there more often then I should be). Well... so far I haven't written much, but that's largely because I've only been to 2 or 3 of the meetings. Do have a few book ideas, and since finals are over, I may try to implement them. Also, the people in the group (only 5 of us) are pretty nice. They haven't kicked me out yet, so that's a good thing.

I think I kind of want a nook. Those things look awesome, though I have to admit, the average book price on those (9.99) is a little high, espicially considering the device costs 260, and that I can get a softcover book for 7 dollars new (after membership card). Though, I've heard rumors that the next kindle will be fully color, and it will use an IMOD display linky on IMOD here to get color, so that might be something better to save up for... except that the Kindle is on a closed platform, while the nook is on the Android OS, so if I ever wanted to code my own apps or anything, well, I'd be out of luck on the kindle. Also, the I may be wrong, but I heard the nook offers support on more ebook formats, so that's the way I'm looking... (Ok, the main reason I want an ereader is so I can read romance stories in public with out getting weird looks... one of the reasons I never pick up romance novels.)

Anyway, I'm going to log. Have work in the morning... Stupid job. ~Night!

Been Neglecting

2009-09-19T01:17:00.002-04:00

I guess it's been a while since I last posted to my blog, though this is more of laziness than anything else. It's not that I've been any busier than I use to be, or that I have had more going on, it's just, I don't know. Each passing day I find it harder and harder to care about things that, a year ago I cared deeply about. My love of gaming and anime have almost completely disappeared, and I tend to spend my time alone more often then is probably healthy, though, who would I spend time with? Kira, one of my friends in Orlando, tend to be too busy with school and about a dozen theater projects, Gina lives in Maleborne now since she started at FIT about 2 years ago, Aaron now only calls me when he needs his computer fixed. And I have never been adept at making new friends... Am I such a horrible person that the people I know wish to spend no time with me?

School's not going any better. I'm currently on Academic Probation after last semester, and each day sees my will to succeed go lower. It's not that I don't like learning, just, College is designed in a way that is currently costly, uninspiring, and, well, sometimes, unneeded. I doubt I'd ever amount to anything that would need a college education, so why am I here? Though, I guess the uninspiring part is my fault. I mean, people who go on to college should be self driven. I was back at MCC, but now... It's just, I don't see much point in it all. Hell, most days I don't see any point in rising from my bed.

Maybe everyone hates me because I'm too depressing, or maybe because I'm too useless...

On the plus side, I've been reading a lot. Been reading tons of fiction books, and one of these days, I'll write something worth reading... maybe... assuming I don't do something stupid first. But, I own so many books now, it would be a shame not to read them all. I may not be able to find a boy who is actually interested in me, but at least I have books to read... Ya, I know, two completely unrelated things, but it's 1:30 in the morning here, so I should be allowed to be incoherent.

Anyway, I have work tomorrow morning (that's right, a blog post where I don't complain about my job), so ~night!

What a glorius thing

2009-02-27T12:26:00.001-05:00

Can't talk, Megacon is this weekend. After I get done typing this up (and a shower) I'm hitting the con. I'll give more information when I get back.

Also, I got replacement vehicle. It's a red Volvo 2000, and it was the only vehicle in my price range that wasn't leaking oil or had something horribly wrong. Given that, after tax, tag, and title it set me back 5,000, and my insurance payout on my Volkswagen was 6,000, I'm ok with it. Had it checked out at a tires plus, and the only thing it needs done is a break job. Though, truthfully, I'm also spending some of the insurance money on much needed Megacon things... =).

Car Accidents Suck

2009-02-19T00:00:00.003-05:00

Monday was not a good day. Well, it didn't start off as a bad day, but when I was driving to work, a guy turned in front of me, and, well, a crash happened. The other guy got the ticket for violating my right of way, but that doesn't make it any better. The insurance adjuster took a look at my car yesterday and pronounced it totaled. And I was just getting use to my vehicle. I mean, I was starting to like that car... I had spent 12,000 miles in it. It was MY car. It drove the way I liked driving it. I could listen to my Zune in it through the auxiliary audio cable. It got decent mileage... and now it's gone. Sure, I'm getting an insurance payment/check thing to replace it, but I'll have to get reattached to some other vehicle. It probably won't be greenish blue, not that the color matters or anything, but still. I mean, my old car wasn't anything more than a beat up station wagon, but still. It was like a friend. It was something I depended upon to get me from point A to point B. It was a place I could go to when I wanted to be alone and let the world fade away from me.

And then there is the other reason I'm down about it. I only had it for 5 months. My first vehicle. Gone in 5 months. Now, I have been driving for years, but those cars/trucks/things were all under my parents' name. This was under my name. And it's gone. In 5 months. FIVE months... I can't even be trusted to take care of something for five freaking months before I get it destroyed. How sad is that? Maybe the car would still be operational if someone else had bought it. I mean, it was a used car though, but I mean... I don't know. Anyway, if I don't beat myself over stuff, then who will?

Megacon is at the end of this month. Going to be buying my ticket at the end of this month. Now, granted, I've been saving up for it for the last 5 weeks, but I still feel guilty for going, espically after the accident. I probably won't have much money for the dealer room when I get there, but hopefully I'll be able to pick up a new anime for my shelf. Not that I've watched the ones I currently have. And not like I have much in the way of transportation to the convention...

Though, truthfully, I do have a loaner car. My boss at my job up here in Orlando has been working on a 1989 buick for the last couple of years, and has lent me the car until I can get a replacement for the one I've just got destroyed. It runs pretty smoothly, but when you turn the AC on it spits dirt at you, and the speedometer and the odometer don't function. Still, it's better than walking everywhere I go. I am pretty grateful he's lending it to me. Also, my boss was the one who picked me up after the accident. I may not like driving out to the job, but my boss is a good person. And if I had to have anyone as a boss, he'd be near the top of people I'd want.

The bulk of my tests are going to be the first week of March, so I guess I need to start studying. I'll try to post again later in the week. Aiming for at least 24 blog posts this year, though judging by how many I currently have, I don't know if I'll make it. So ~Night!

First Post of 09

2009-01-27T01:08:00.002-05:00

Well... this is the first post of 09. I didn't really make any New Year resolutions... well... except maybe find a boyfriend. But since I've been kind of trying to do that for the last year, well, I don't know how well that's going to go.

I'm also trying to do better in school, I guess, though this semester I'm only taking 3 classes (largely due to any of the classes I need being already scheduled.) The three classes I'm taking are Introduction to Thermodynamics, Electromagnetic Wave Propagation, and Digital Systems. Out of those classes, the Electromagnetic one is considered an elective, and the Digital Systems class is pretty easy (up until last semester, the class I took last semester, System Datapaths I think it was called, had Digital Systems as the Prereq. The teacher taught it as if everyone had already taken Digital Systems). Still, the math in two of my classes are going to be hard, and I need to spend more time studying and doing homework then I am currently doing. Hopefully I will... I'm at least taking better notes and reading over my previous notes.

I've started running along the circumference of UCF at night... Well, not so much running the entirety as running a portion, walking, then running again then walking. I'm hoping getting more exercise will help me to keep focus and maybe help me get a boyfriend, but that could just be crazy thinking on my part.

Anyway, just wanted to type up a "Hello, I'm still alive!" page...

Oh, over winter break I had an idea for an MMO. It would be a space based MMO that handled skills in a manner similar to oblivion, though without the levels... It would focus on about 3 factions, faction based PvP, but the cool thing would be the business model. Instead of a 15 a month fee, it would be free to play, though for 5 a month you'd get access to crafting abilities, a different 5 would give you access to truly lawless space, another 5 would give a capital ships license, and the final 5 maybe something like an Exotic Weapons license or something. And, instead of paying 20 a month, there'd be a option for all 4 licenses for 15 a month... that way, if someone wants to try out a game, or come back in after a break, they could hop right in... and if you had a PvPer or something with no interests in crafting, they could only pay for the parts of the game they'd use... Ya, I know it's all crazy, and I know I probably shouldn't be posting it on this blog... in public, but I think it is a good ides... but maybe I'm crazy... or, more exactly, I am crazy...

Anyway, ~Night!

Finals Week 08

2008-12-08T21:02:00.002-05:00

Well, it's finals week. I have my first two exams tomorrow, and my third one on Thursday. I know I'm pretty much screwed on my Semiconductor's class, but I should be able to pull off a good grade on my statics test (assuming I do some more studying). My computer Organization class isn't till Thursday, which means my free time on Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday morning will be spent studying for that exam... at least, I'll try to be doing that.

Though, part of tomorrow afternoon I'm going to be doing some Christmas shopping with Kira. She doesn't actually need to do any more Christmas shopping, but she's still willing to keep me company. Since I don't have a lot of funds at this moment (33 to last me till whenever I get my next paycheck from my job up here in Orlando. My boss is normally good at paying me on time, but there have been more than a few instances where I got 3 weeks worth of pay at once... due to lack of pay in previous weeks), I'm just going to focus on getting some gifts for the people up here, since for my family and for the bulk of my friends, I'll be able to give them their gifts on Christmas day, or very close to then.

Ok, the real reason I'm writing this is because I really don't want to study. Everytime I study, I'm able to do 3 to 5 problems with out... well... problem, but then I hit a question that I can't solve, that causes me to bang my head against the wall in frustration until I want to throw my book into the nearest wall. After that, I kind of feel kind of stupid. And I don't do anymore studying for the evening. That hasn't happened yet, but... I don't know. A part of is under the crazy impression that, by somehow not studying, the test won't come. I know it's madness. I know it makes as much sense as some of the urban fantasy books I read do (speaking of which, if you haven't read any of the Harry Dresden books by Jim Butcher, you're missing out), but... I never said (or gave the impression) that I'm sane. Of course, another part of me feels growing dread and apprehension at the prospects of the oncoming tests. And the best solution my mind has for that type of anxiety isn't a healthy solution... Though I haven't done anything remotely like that for... 2 weeks? I think. Time blurs together way too much.

Of course, I also quit EvE 2 weeks ago, so maybe that was contributing to everything as well. I know I haven't really gotten more social, and I haven't been looking to find a solution to my lack of boyfriend problem. Or maybe it's the extra lamp I put in my room (I like light... being inside with out light is bad. Being outside with artificial light is also bad though.)Or maybe I'm on the verge of some sort of breakdown. I don't really know.

Anyway, I need to get back to studying... so ~Night

Post Thanksgiving Thing

2008-12-01T23:14:00.003-05:00

Well... it's the Monday after Thanksgiving... I spent the day itself largely with family, so I guess I had a good Thanksgiving. I mean, at least I have family to spend it with. Though, we did what we did last year for the holiday, we hit Busch Gardens in Tampa. They have a restaurant there my parents like, though we save it for special occasions. Then we spent the rest of the day seeing the various attraction things, like their animal area thing and their hospitality house (ie, free beer place). Since I'm over 21 and don't drink, I donated my free beer to my parents.

I decided to go for broke on Black Friday. I spent my paycheck getting some Christmas gifts for my family. By family I mean my parents, since my check plus an oil change on my vehicle didn't hold out much farther than that. I got my father a 3 books, The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde, The Complete Sherlock Holmes, Volume 1 and The Complete Sherlock Holmes, Volume 2 by Sir Author Cannon Doyle. I know he wanted to read the Dorian Gray book, and I want to read it as well (I did buy 2 copies of it. I try not to borrow other peoples Christmas gifts), but I'm not too sure about the Sherlock Holmes books. Still, I know he hasn't read them yet, so I don't see why he wouldn't like them... As for my Mom, I got her another year's subscription to Norton Anti-Virus. She gets a little paranoid about her machine, but she doesn't really know too much about it, and she's always afraid she'll break it somehow. I'll probably end up installing/placing in the renewal code for her as well. For my sisters, well, I know what to get one of them. She lost her DS charger, so I'm going to pick her up a replacement one for Christmas. For the other... well... I don't know yet.

As for my friends... haven't given it a lot of thought yet... I know I'm getting Kira (a friend in Orlando) a gift card to a clothing shop. Not because I think she needs or wants more clothes, but because I want more clothes and I don't want to go shopping by myself =P. I'm going to probably put it in one of those children's books. You know the type, the overly think, almost cardboard pages. I'm doing it like that because, every time we're in a book store, she gets distracted by them. Aaron said he didn't want anything for Christmas, but I'll probably get him some Wii or Xbox live points. Like 5 dollar's worth or something.

I've found a few new bands since I dropped my EvE subscription and picked up the Zune subscription. The first one is Savatage. They're an 80's rock band that eventually turns into Trans-Siberian Orchestra. The best thing about them is they're from Florida (Tarpon Springs to be exact), so I've been listening to them a lot. After Forever seems like a good band. Just downloaded them today though, so I've only had one listen so far. Still... they sound kind of like Old Nightwish, at least, their self titled album, After Forever does. The other ones for this band (at least, the other ones I saw) weren't available for download with the Zune subscription, they were purchase only. Finally, I found a band called Kittie. They're an all female metal band out of Canada... kind of sounds like a less technical Arch Enemy.

Hopefully, I'm getting less emoish, but... I... a part of me says no... If I can pull through the Winter I should be ok. And if I can't, well, at least there will be one less whiny blog out there. Anyway, I'm going to call it a night... ~Night!

Docking Up

2008-11-24T13:50:00.004-05:00

I'm not going to be renewing my EvE subscription come December. I'm not really enjoying it as much as I use to, and I think I need a break. Also, last month I was kind of using it as a way to escape reality, and that's probably not healthy. Though, to be fair, the other way I escape isn't too healthy either. I still need some sort of entertainment though (ok, maybe I don't, but that's not the point) so I'll start a subscription with the Zune service. I want to find some new music, and since I spend more time in my car then I do at my computer, well, plugging my Zune into my tape deck while I drive from Orlando to Manatee County will make it more enjoyable.

I don't know if I mentioned it, but Will was down from Iraq for about 3 weeks. I only got to see him Halloween night =(. But then, he and I aren't as close as we use to be back before he joined the military. And it doesn't help when he's down, he's back in my hometown. With out a car. And where he lives, and where my parents are, are about an hour away (his parents live near the beach. It's only 14 miles from my parents' place, but the cops near the beach aren't friendly, and will pull you over if you're going 1 mile over in a 25).

Another reason for me taking a break, I guess, is to try to make myself more social. I mean, I never canceled anything in real life to do something online, but I've never really went out of my way to do stuff in real life, well, stuff outside of attend the occasional club meeting or something (I am a member of Metal Club, and our president is a woman as well). Maybe if I get more social, and see if I can't do more things with more people, maybe that might help me. Or maybe I'm just speaking crazy talk, and I'll end up curled on my bed because I have very few friends...

Anyway, I'm going to go grab some food, so ~Night.

Promised Post

2008-11-03T22:27:00.003-05:00

Yes, here's my updated post...

I've been feeling up and down... with a lot more lows than highs. I have almost stopped caring about school, though I still at least attend classes. Well, I have withdrawn from one of my classes... It was my electrical networks class.... Well... not networks, systems. It's not that I don't see a point or purpose in school... I just can't see how one relates to me per se... ok, maybe that's not quite right either. It's just... I feel like there's no escape from my current jobs. Not that they're bad jobs, but, just... I've already reached the amount of schooling I need for them... and, well, a part of me believes that, no matter what I do, I'm going to be stuck at these jobs until the day I die. And, well... sometimes I want that day to be closer than other days.

The other reason I've lost a good deal amount of interest in my course work is, I have very little idea in some of my classes what's going on. That was the primary reason I dropped electrical systems, and although I kind of grasp some of the stuff in my Semiconductor's class, but the math just escapes me. I thought I'd never need Quantum Physics and Chemistry for Computer Engineering. I never thought I'd be so totally wrong. Maybe I should just start thinking about switching to computer sci... at least there'd be more programming.

Starting to get a little back into Wiccan and the occult and that type of stuff... Picked up a Tarot deck on Friday. In the very least, it has really pretty artwork, though it's kind of hard to find a deck that isn't either in bright pastels or way too gothy. Still, I picked up a fantasy deck, and I like the way everything is shown in it... Now all I need to do is find my old books on the Subject from highschool/early college and I should be set on using it...

Also, I picked up "My Japanese Coach" for the DS. That game is pretty cool. Well... not so much a game as it's a learning experience thing, but still, it's a nice addition to my game catalog.

Anyway, I'm going to log... ~Night

Only Partly Crazy

2008-11-02T21:50:00.003-05:00

Well... I'm still alive. Halloween was fairly boring this year... Though I did get to see Will, so that was kind of cool. Still...

Anyway, I'm going to get some sleep. I'll give a longer post tomorrow... maybe. ~Night.

A little better

2008-09-23T00:01:00.003-04:00

I'm feeling a little better, but I do have a test coming up on Wednesday for my electrical networks thingy class. Hopefully, the name of the class won't be on the test. I need to study a lot more for it, but the bulk of it seems to be a little bit more advanced versions of integration. Hopefully I can pull through...

There's got to be an opening somewhere here in front of me

2008-09-18T22:45:00.007-04:00

I think I may be close to going off the edge...

I don't know. Lately, I've had almost no desire to do anything. The only reason I'm typing this right now is because it's too early to go to sleep, and too late to take a nap. So, right now my main reason for typing this is to kill the time between the blissful states of unconsciousness. Outside of work, and school I guess, all I want to do is to curl up in a ball on my bed, or escape into EvE, or do something else that, well, would probably get me locked up for 3 days if I did more than think about it. I've also been indulging in an old habit that, well, is the reason I make sure the shirts I wear are at least long enough to cover my upper arms, though the bulk of those scars I got back in High School.

When I'm around friends, or more likely a friend (I'm not part of any actual group, so none of my friends know each other), it's no where near as bad. In fact, the more depressed I feel in isolation, the sillier and goofier I get around others. Not, like, disruptive in class or anything, but... Of course, afterwards I always feel worse. I either do something to totally fuck everything up, or I do a lot of little stupid things, or I don't do enough good things, or... I don't know. Not that anyone says anything. Half the time, people expect me to do stupid stuff. Me and my morbid, twisted sense of humor. Like, last night, Kira and I went and grabbed some dinner, then hit up the local bookstore (I asked her to grab dinner, but the reason I was calling her was to return her call). I acted like an idiot there. And then I got a little too playful near the end. It's stuff like that that I do all the time.

I've also missed a few classes recently. No more than one class per class, but still. It's only a month in the semester, and I'm missing classes! Not a good sign. =(. And I don't really do anything productive during that time. I just end up feeling to guilty. Which makes me just feel worse. Luckily, I haven't missed any work because of this, but still, missing class...

If my parents found out about this, I'd probably get an hour long lecture from my dad about how I'm fucking up everything in my life, and how I'll probably have no useful future. And you know what, he'd probably be correct. All I am is a goddamn failure. If there's a way to screw something up, I'd probably find it. A few weeks ago, I had to swap out a touch screen monitor at a client's place for my job, and I managed to screw that up. Took 20 minutes when it should have taken 5. And that's one of my good screw ups. All I am is a screw up... To be fair though, I changed one of my main passwords to a variation of "I am not a Failure", just to try to force me to think that once a day. I don't think it's been helping...

And another point for being a failure, I'm 22. I'm single. Probably be single till the day I die. I can't find a boyfriend to save my life. Not that it matters much. Any prospect I'd probably scare off because I'd either be too needy, or too cuddly, or too emoish, or a billion other personal defects. And I don't approach anyone, which is another one of my problems. But when I see someone, and I want to say something to them, all I can think of is all the times I fucked that up in the past, and all the ways I could screw up that conversation. And I remind myself of all the other conversations I failed at. And I think, why the hell would they even be interested in me, or sometimes if they were interested in me, they'd say something to me.

And then, finances, I've been screwed. I have more bills then I did last semester, and a smaller income. And I don't want to ask my parents for any more help than they're already giving me (the gas to go back and forth every weekend, and allowing me to pay my car insurance through them instead of through the insurance agency), since I don't want to be the only one between my sisters and I that can't take care of her own finances. Of course, it doesn't really matter. They're all probably just waiting for me to fail or screw up or something. Probably expecting no less from me. Of course, the reputation is probably well earned...

I feel a little better now that I've ranted, but I still feel like everything's spiraling into eventual oblivion. I know things aren't as bad as I paint them out to be, and simple logic would tell me that no one wants me to screw up (except, possible, myself). Still though, I feel almost completely lost in my classes, espically my circuit design class and my semiconductors class. A good part of it is the math, though the circuit class has the problem of simply analyzing things, and the semiconductors class has reintroduced my severe hatred of quantum physics. And it doesn't help that the circuit teacher writes so small I can't make out the diagrams or the math, or that my semiconductor's professor goes through the slides faster then I can write them down. The worst part it, I think if I knew more about the basic concepts that these classes are referring to, I'd like the class. Of course, it doesn't help that my classes are about an hour and a half earlier then they were last semester. Though I have been going to sleep earlier...

Anyway, I think I killed enough time to allow me to enter blissful slumber, so ~Night!

New Place

2008-09-11T17:00:00.003-04:00

Sorry, it's been a while... I've been kind of busy...ish....lazy....ish....thingy.

I'm now living in a new dorm. This one is apartment style, so I don't have to worry about someone else's tv set. Though my new dorm is on the first floor, which means I have people above me =(. That, and I think the floor may be softer than the bed... =(

I'm retaking statics this semester =(. Though so far I'm doing pretty well. I should be though, considering this is the second time I took it. My other classes are semiconductors, Electronic Systems (II maybe?), and Intro to Computer Engineering (AKA computer logic I think). Into to computer engineering is fun so far, since I do enjoy Boolean Algebra. My semiconductor's class though, is kind of like Calc 3, Chem, Electronic Networks, and Modern Physics all rolled up into one class =(.

There's a guy in my statics class I kind of like. He seems to be heavily into anime as well, but I don't think he's interested in me... Since I have the class Tuesdays and Thursdays, I might ask him next Tuesday.

I apologize for the choppiness and poor writing quality of this blog, but I'm kind of in a hurry, since I have a stack of homework I need to finish, and since I don't have the weekend to do it, I need to do as much of it as I can tonight and tomorrow night. So ~Night!

Oh, and my boss (Orlando, not parents) is considering selling his business, so I may be looking for a new second job soon =(. (Lots of frownys in this blog...)

No Vacation for You

2008-07-24T01:45:00.004-04:00

Well, my manager at the station is on Vacation, which means I'm stuck in Manatee County working 70 hours this week =(. At least I'll be able to see some of my friends...

My lease is up on the 6th for my dorm in Orlando, and my new lease doesn't start until the 22end, which means I'm going to be stuck home for about 3 weeks. And I still need to pester the people over in Financial Aid about my student loans =(...

Anyway, I'm going to call it a night, have to be back at work in about 9 hours, so ~Night!

Movies!

2008-07-03T16:08:00.004-04:00

Saw Walle Tuesday night, for a second time (first time was on friday). Both times I had friends drag me to see it, both times I enjoyed it. If some of my friends wanted to see it again, I'd probably go see it a third time. It's the first movie in a long time I can honestly say I've throughly enjoyed to make it worth seeing 2 times, epically the credits =).

I would like to see the Demon Barber of Fleetstreet, err, I mean, Sweeny Tod. I'm trying to convince the same friends that dragged me to Walle to see it with me, since I did see the original back in 6th grade (an orchestra teacher showed it to the class while he was on vacation...). I just don't want to be the creepy person who watches movies by herself.

I also got all my classes registered for fall 08. I'm retaking statics, and the other 3 are all Electrical/Computer Engineering courses (they're both run by the same department, so the only difference between the 2 majors is like 12 credit hours). The three Electrical classes all have labs... =(. And with the way my schedule is set up for next semester (not my fault, stupid lack of choices) it looks like I'll only be able to work Wednesdays and Weekends. On one hand, it'll give me a good amount of time to study, but on the other hand, it means significantly less spending money for things like... food. And goodbye to my idea of being able to save up money to buy my own car so I can stop using my parents' and sort of become one step more independent. Still, if I do things right, I'll study more than last semester, and hopefully get my GPA to something higher than what it is currently at... (not that it's bad, I mean, my MCC gpa was like, 3.5, but my USF one is like 2.6, and combined I'm like 2.9ishkinda....)

Oh, I also have an idea for another short story. If I put it on paper, I'll throw it up here. Otherwise, never mind about it.... Maybe I should change majors and be a writer, though judging by this blog, I doubt that'd be a good idea... everything would probably be angsty, whiny stuff =(. Anyway, ~Night!

Promised Post

2008-06-30T23:02:00.003-04:00

Haven't done much in the last 24 hours, well, out side of work. Still, I promised a post today, and I'm going to try to deliver. It'll help keep my mind off of others things I want to do anyways.

I'd really like to quit my job at home, but since I currently use a vehicle provided to me by my parents, I doubt that's going to happen anytime soon... I just don't like dealing with them.. My mom's always a nervous wreck, and my Dad's a manipulative person who just always gets on my nerves. I don't really have a problem with my mom, but my dad... I get so filled with resentment, anger, frustration, guilt, and a few other emotions when I think about him, that I begin to think that it might be better to disable my thinking processes then to have to think about him again, and it gets worse when I'm around him. Combine that with my normal less than perky mood, and, well, I guess that might explain my lack of posts, and my mental stability.

It's not that he's a bad person or anything, since I know I'm making him seem worse than he really is, it's just that... he makes me so frustrated and upset, and I don't see any positive way to see him less. And I dread the idea of cutting him, or any one else in my family, out of my life. Between eliminating myself from all family connections and living life more alone then I currently do or significantly lessing my lifespan, well, I'm not going to say which one looks more appealing, but... well...

I'm going to call it a night, and try to get myself distracted by some amv's. Until tomorrow anyway, when I have to go to my other job, the one my dad set up with one of his friends because he thinks I'm too incompetent to do anything..... anyway, ~Night.

June...ish...Kindof

2008-06-29T23:05:00.002-04:00

Well... it looks like I'm getting really lazy... no post in about a month =(. It's just... I don't really have much of a desire to really do much, and it seems doing this takes more effort than it did a year ago =(. Maybe it's my current living arrangements, maybe it's the fact I travel back and forth from Orlando to Manatee County, maybe I don't live as interesting a life now than I use to, but it just bothers me when I type this that I don't update it as often as I'd like.

As too what's new, not too much. Been spending a lot of time reading (disk world, Anita Blake, The Historian, and a few others), out side of that it's mostly work and travel =(. But I'll post more when I'm less tired =( (seem to be that a lot, too =(.) ~Night....

May!

2008-05-27T23:59:00.002-04:00

Well, it's almost the end of May, and ya, my posting ability has gone down hill. The bright side of the month, though, was that I got to attend Jacon. It wasn't last weekend, but the weekend before (the 16th, 17th, and 18th). I did not have a costume per say, but I did pick up this loli-dress thing at Megacon, and I ended up wearing that on one of the days at the con.

Lately, I've just been apathetic though. And I mean more so than usual. I don't know, I just, don't really have a desire to do much. My view point of life at this current moment is something to kill the time between birth and death, and... well... I just... I don't know. It's not lack of sleep that's causing it, and it's not boredom. I want to say it's my normal level of depressionesqueness (ya, I invent new words), but... maybe being in Orlando, with less friends than I use to have back when everyone was in Manatee County, living with someone who is basically a complete stranger, with my only privacy being the time I spend in my car, and working two jobs, neither of which I actually willingly signed up for, might be having a toll after almost a year of living up here.

On the plus side I did meet a guy at Jacon. He's cute, into gaming (but not creepily so), and also watches anime. Him and I got together on Monday, played a few rounds of Advance Wars against each other, then we went back to his place. Everything was going well until he introduced me to his boyfriend, whom he lives with. Though I probably should have expected that since I met him at the yaoi pajama party.

Getting back to Jacon, I went with Kira (the girl I met at megacon) and a guy friend from my home town (Daniel, the one who works at the game store). We did have an enjoyable time... probably the only high point of the month.

My parents aren't doing too well together. I don't think they will go through with a divorce or something like that, but they aren't getting along as well as they use to. There's no direct fighting, but... I don't know. My dad's kind of getting a little bit controlling towards my mom, or a little bit jealous, or maybe a little bit of both, or maybe she's just trying to be more independent, and it's starting to annoy my father, or maybe they're both just crazy. They're also planning on moving soon, largely due to financial reasons, and they want me back "home" more often so I can help them pack everything and move. Well, that and my father thinks there's going to be a depression soon.

I put home in "" because I don't think I really know where I'm suppose to be. I mean, one of the reasons I went with that guy from Jacon (his name is Matt...) is so I'd have an excuse to not be down there on Monday (which was Labor Day, or Memorial Day, or one of those weird holidays). I had it off from work, and I really didn't want to be at my parents place. On the other side, I just, I don't like my living arrangements in Orlando. It just, doesn't feel like home here either.

Anyway, I'm going to log for the evening. That's enough of a long winded rant for one day.

Summer Break

2008-04-30T22:28:00.002-04:00

It's been a long school year, but it's now summer break. Don't know how well I did yet, but... I'll probably need to retake statics. Not statistics. Statics. Now, instead of working and school, I'll be working long weeks... and still driving back and forth between Orlando and Manatee County.

One year Closer to Death

2008-04-11T16:06:00.003-04:00

Today is my 22end birthday. So... I guess happy birthday to me.

Well.. a lot of stuff has happened in the last couple of weeks, I recently changed roommates, and I'm not doing as well in two of my classes as I would like. But... well... I don't know. I do need to log so I can drive back to my parent's place, so I can work tomorrow and sunday, then drive back here... =(.

Megacon 08, the return of Megacon!

2008-03-09T22:04:00.003-04:00

Ya, it's that time of year again... just got back from Megacon 08. This year I hit it for all three days, and I had a pretty good time. Also picked up some new anime (Princess Princess and Full Metal Panic... ya, I know, the last one isn't new to most people...). Also picked up a few cool t-shirts, and best of all I picked up a new, super cute, kind of loli-type dress. Hopefully, I'll get a chance to wear it at Jacon this year, though I need to begin saving up money for that convention now... stupid conventions and their money needing. On the plus side, I shouldn't have to worry about needing any new anime for a little bit.

Outside of megacon, and a friend and I hitting karaoke night at one of the local bars (I didn't drink, she did though), I haven't done almost anything social, which is bad, and also probably why I haven't made any updates. I just... haven't been in the mood to do much outside of sleep/eve/attend classes/work. And the only reason why I do the work part is because I need the money.

I'm starting to really hate my job with my parents. Almost to the point where I think about doing something really stupid to not have to go work there. I don't know what it is about the job. I mean, there's nothing blatantly bad about it. I think it may just be some of the people I work with there. Maybe. I don't know. It could be that I didn't get a choice in weather or not I worked there. Just, what ever it is, I hate being there... it's not that bad while I'm there, it's just on the way there, and during the week, I dread going back. Megacon at least was a decent break from it, and Jacon is coming up in May, so that'll be another fun break.

So far, I don't think I'm doing that well in my classes. I haven't been as... diligent in my homework as I should be. Been doing ok on the tests, but... It's just every time I sit down to do my homework, I end up curling into a little ball around a pillow, and that's probably not healthy. Though after Megacon I actually do want to sit down and do my homework, so maybe it's just loneliness induced or something.

Anyway, I'm going to call it a night. I apologize for how long it's been since my last update, but to be fair, a certain someone said they'd be updating often (at least on their other blog..) so =P. ~Night

Stupid Time...

2008-02-08T18:18:00.000-05:00

Gah, there never seems to be enough time in any given day =(.

So far, work's going ok, though since my manager was out of town last week, and he was too busy catching up with some of his stuff this week, I haven't been payed from my Orlando job in two weeks =(. So come Monday, hopefully I'll have 3 paychecks waiting for me. Then I can use a third of that to pay off what I put on my credit card over the last two weeks (maybe I should put a little bit more than a third down on my credit card, though I do have one or other two bills pending.)

Anyway, I know it's a short post, but I need to begin driving back to my parent's place (about 40miles south of Tampa). I'm going to call it a night...

Also, I din't get a chance to ask my roommate about their comment yet. I might do it while I'm packing up my school stuff, or I might do it come Sunday night. ~Night

It's only 4,399

2008-01-21T23:04:00.000-05:00

Well, to answer the question, my gamerscore is only 4,399 points. Which is strange, because I didn't know you could get a number ending in something other than 5 or 10. I don't have a lot of free time to play my 360 though, and it's at my parents house... and I don't play games for the gamer score. I play a game because, well... I enjoy that game. There are things I enjoy in games, and going out to collect x number of flags, or doing something ridiculously hard and tedious, isn't why I play games. Also, the type of games I tend to enjoy are largely their arcade games, though with the way their service has been lately, I haven't even been able to play some of the ones I purchased before hand, because since I'm no longer on my original system (stupid Red Ring Of Death last year) I can't play the full version of any game tied to my original 360 with out being fully logged in =(.

So far, I hate my statics class. It's a lot of vector mathematics. We were not meant to do 3 dimensional analysis on a 2 dimensional sheet of paper. Or at least, those of us who can't draw weren't. That and 3 dimensional object was always my largest problem in calc 3. And also the teacher can't teach... and the 160 students in the class... ya... I don't like the class so far.

Right now I'm in the library, since my next class has been canceled because the teacher has an out of town conference to attend to on Digital Microwave Tranmissions or something. I didn't really have a good night last night (which was when I started typing everything above the bar), just... I haven't been feeling too good, and I guess I mean both physically and mentaly.

Physically, I don't want to eat. The thought of food almost makes me want to vomit. That doesn't mean I don't eat, just I'm eating less. And drinking less soda as well. I guess that's kind of a good thing, since that means less out of pocket expenss to food, but since it's not me not wanting to eat, and more me getting sick if I do eat, I doubt that's healthy. I've also been sneezing and coughing a lot more, though I don't know off the top of my head if there are any sicknesses that combine "food makes you want to vomit" with "I sneeze a lot". Hopefully it'll go away soon.

Mentaly though, it's the same things I've been dealing with since I got out to UCF. Largely lack of people to do things with/talk to/hang out with. It also doesn't help that, over the weekend and Sunday night (ie, Friday Night, Saturday Night, and Sunday Night) I got a combined of like 10 hours of sleep =(. So I was pretty exhausted yesterday. Friday and Saturday night's lack of sleep had to do with me doing things with friends in Manatee County, and with me having to go into work early on Saturday and Sunday morning. The lack of sleep on Sunday night though was because my room mate didn't get off the phone until like 2 or 3 am. And they took the call inside the dorm room because it was 40 degrees outside (ok, it's Florida. The extent for what stores sell down here for cold weather is either a thicker than normal T-shirt, or an ultra-thin jacket.) On top of that though, it's some of the things my roommate said on the phone that also bothered me. I don't know if I was the center of the conversation, and I know it's kind of concieted to think so, but... I don't know. It just... felt kind of like I was the subject of the conversation. Espically because my roommate said that they couldn't talk freely on the matter with current company. But it wasn't like it was insultive... just... it seemed to be about something I don't like to share with people, but due to me living with my room mate I ended up sharing it with them (and no, I haven't posted about it on this blog, and I currently have no plans to do so yet. It is one of the reasons why I tend to get depressed easily though), and they didn't have a problem about it when I told them about it, but I guess the way they said it on the phone implied a problem. Of course, I always assume the worst with anything, so hopefully that's the case here. I don't want to try to clarify the matter because I don't want to get branded as someone who doesn't allow others their privacy, but... there's an event coming to Orlando my roommate wants to hit, but since they don't have a car, I might take them. On the way to the event I'll probably ask them to clarify their opion on the matter. Then there was a lot of other, little stuff through out the week (non-roommate related) that taken by themselves wouldn't cause me any grief, but each one compounded upon each other, so by Monday night I really wasn't in a proper state of mind. I almost did something last night that would have been really, really stupid. That's all I'm going to say. (I can still use that phrase even if it took half the blog to tell)

I know I occasionaly think this, but once again I'm thinking about quiting gaming altogether and just watching anime/reading manga. I think I get more satisfaction from reading manga (currently just started After Class Nightmare and still reading Tsubasa Resevoir Chronicles) then I do from playing EvE. And a lot of the games that are currently out right now are less fun and more immersive. I don't know... it's just... I find Manga and books and anime to be more calming then gaming. Though with those passive forms of entertainment, my mind constantly tries to create side/different/parrallel story paths for everything, and that gets annoying.

Anyway, I'm going to get logging. I got a decent amount of sleep this morning (like 6 or 7 hours) and I got to spend some time doing some things other than working, school, or school work (I listened to my Zune for like 3 hours this morning trying to relax a little bit) so I shouldn't have to worry about me doing anything... bad tonight. So... ~Night!

First Post of 08

2008-01-13T22:57:00.000-05:00

Well, it's my first post of 08, and I'm back in school already =(. Actually, I've been in school for a full week, so tomorrow is the first day after drop add. I'm kind of lucky they had drop add, because with out it, I wouldn't have been able to get into my fourth class and lock myself as a full time student. My classes for this semester are Electric Networks, Engineering Statics, Engineering Analysis, and Computer Science I. You might think I should have already had Comp Sci I, but since intro to C is it's prereq, and since it goes into things like sort functions, Link Lists, Program Memory Management, ect, it looks to be a little bit more complicated then my Computer science course back at MCC.

We had some company over for the Christmas break, which is my excuse why I didn't get anything done. They were from England, and were clients of my dad, err, one of them was anyways. The others were part of his family. They were fairly nice people, and we got along well with them. Spent most of my free time (which I had a lot of over the break) doing things with either them, my family, or my friends, and I got to sleep in, so I was happy.

I've gotten my hands on two new 360 games Assassin's Creed (which I own) and Mass Effect (which I'm borrowing from a friend). I have to say I'm impressed with both of them, though I think I enjoy Assassin's Creed more than Mass Effect, but the later is a lot more addictive. Still... when I'm home on the weekends, I'll be trying to play both (at least, as long as my friend allows me to continue borrowing Mass Effect. I'll probably wait for that one to drop to 30/40 before I pick it up).

I probably need to read more. Since I started UCF, outside of my occasional text book reading, all I've read is one Halo novel (it's not as bad as it sounds). Right now I'm trying to read through The Golden Compass but since I don't have a lot of free time (I blame class and commute time, since it obviously couldn't be me playing EvE), I'm not getting too far. As one could probably guess, I think my writing skills are on the decline because of it =(. If anyone has any good books they'd like to recommend...

As to my classes, I really only know one or two people in my Computer Science I class. Outside of that, I really don't know anyone in my other classes =(. Hopefully I'll be able to meet some people and actually do stuff with them outside of class this semester. Hopefully... maybe...

Driving back and forth from home to my dorm does have a good side. The Gamestop (use to be an EBGames) there that I occasionally hang out at recently (ok, maybe he's been there since September and I'm only now posting about it...) got a cute guy there. His name is Daniel and hopefully... eventually (assuming I can be down there more than just a weekend... and not have to spend it all working) we could spend some time outside of the gamestore. He's into anime/video games, he's friendly, polite, and not a sterotypical type of gamer person, and he bathes regularly (actually, he has better hygiene then almost anyone I know). In short... he's basicly an anime/gaming bishonen type of person (yes, he looks like a bishonen too).

Anyway, I need to get some sleep... so night!

Last Post for 07

2007-12-31T21:57:00.000-05:00

Well, this is my last post for 07... Not a lot really going on, just taking it easy for christmas break. So far, I only have 3 classes registered for =(.

Merry Christmass

2007-12-18T22:46:00.000-05:00

Well, it's that time of year for me to wish everyone a merry christmass. I'll have that week off from work in Orlando, so I'll be able to enjoy a little bit of Christmass Vacation... err... ummm... winter break.

Well, I got my grades back for the semester. My C class I got an A, my stats class got a B-, Deferential Equations I got a C in, and in Physics III I got a C as well, which is better than I thought. After I took my DVQ exam, and my physics exam, I thought I horribly failed them both, and for about the week afterwards, I wasn't feeling too perky. What made things even worse was, after the DVQ exam, I grabbed Chinese food, and the fortune cookie I got said "My computer beats me at chess... until I pull the plug". That saying didn't make me feel better... I was orginally happy with the grades I got in those classes, but then I realized that, with more work, or with me actually able to pay attention in those classes, or a combination of the two, I would have easily surpassed those grades. And that revelation put me back down to where I was shortly after I took those tests. Still, at least I won't have to retake either of those courses. I will need to get a few A's in my engineering core courses though, so I can get my GPA in that sector above a 2.5.

Well, Gina's on Winter Break, so that's ok. I took her home from Melbourne, but the only thing she wanted to talk about on the way back was here sorority. It's not that that so much bothers me, but it's more that, there are things about her sorority she won't tell a non-member, and well, I just find it a little disconcerting that she has more of a connection to her sorority than to me, but that may just be selfishness.

My cell phone died yesterday =(. I ended up replacing it today with a different one, but I had to basically spend an entire paycheck to do so. I was planning on using that money to buy christmass presents and to pay down some of my credit card, but it doesn't look like that is going to happen =(. Hopefully I'll be able to use my other paycheck from the station to get what I need. I have 3 people left to buy for. Christine, I only have to pay for her gift, so that won't take too much time. It's my parents that I have no idea on what to do for.

My manager and I moved into a new office at work. I knew we'd be moving eventually, since he has been talking about moving, but I would have like to have spent a little bit more time organizing the move. Now, everything is in a hodgepod mess... though that isn't too much different than how we normally keep things.

I'm going to call it a night, I'm going to be taking my main machine with me when I go back home for christmass break, so hopefully I'll get another post or two before the end of the year. One of these days I'm going to go back and read through my own archives...

Soon...

2007-12-17T00:28:00.000-05:00

Update coming when I get some free time... should be sometime this week.

And for EVE I only use the regular client, so my boot.ini file did not get deleted.

Sunday is kind of like friday

2007-11-25T23:42:00.000-05:00

Well... sorry about the lack of post on Friday. I was busy the whole day, well, outside of the sleeping part.

Having an actual day off, a day spent with friends and family and not either at work or at school, has made me feel a lot better. I have been having a lot of unhealthy, negative, and generally hurtful thoughts over the past month, which is one of the reasons why I haven't been posting regularly. Though getting more than 5 hours of sleep, being able to see friends, and going to a movie with my friends and my father on Friday has banished most of those thoughts.

There have been a few reasons why I've been having those thoughts recently. I'm not doing as well in my classes as I would have liked (I might end up retaking physics III), and feeling that, no matter what you do you're still getting a poor grade in the course and that your best effort is something that won't work for your major, is never good for moral. And I have at least 2 classes where I feel like this (though I think my grades are good enough in statistics and DVQ at the moment..)

Compund that with the fact I dislike both of my jobs... I've already ranted and raved enough about my station's job for anyone to know what I dislike about that job, but the other one I don't like either. I guess it might be because there is too much of that tedius office admin stuff about that job, or maybe it's the lack of coworkers. My other job, where I do the IT support, there's only myself and my manager, so no matter how well you get along with someone, certain mannerisms will eventually cause friction, and... I don't know. Like he has this way of going into in-depth life-story explanation whenever I bring up something non-computer related, and rather than give a straight or technical answer about something, he gives these overly lengthy speaches about the thing in question (like I asked him about about which graphics card I should upgrade to once, and he went into a 45 minute discussion on how graphics cards work). It's further compunded (ya, word of the day is compound...) by... I don't know... I mean, we get along well... maybe it's just the overly small office. He is a good guy, honest, hard working, loyal to those that are loyal to him, and very knowledgeable when it comes to computers, so I shouldn't have any qualms about him... but... I guess he's kind of like my dad... He's a good person and has numerous virtues, but I can only take him in small quantities...

Gina and I also haven't been getting along too well... well, it's less getting along and more of her being too busy to talk every time I call her. She's like the person I feel closest to, and I never get a chance to talk to her, so me slowly losing my friendship with her hurts... I just wish we could spend more time together... I miss being able to talk to her, and being able to do things at a moment's notice with her, and just all the stupid little things we did back at MCC, like hang out at Denny's until 3 am or have a 3 hour lunch at subway, or go shopping for clothes at the mall, or... I just miss doing all those little things with her, and I guess I feel more alone now with out someone to do that all with. I'm trying to develop a new friend's base up here, but...

Then there's EvE. I know I should probably quit it, but it's one of the few things I enjoy up here... it's like CoH, but more enjoyable, a stronger social group, more friends, and more of a sense of accomplisment. But I recently closed down the corp I've been running because of time constraints, and that kind of made me feel bad. I had spent a lot of time getting the corp up and active, invested a lot of energy into it, and to close it... I was CEO for about 6 months... that's kind of like having a job you enjoy, then out of the blue you quit. Or maybe it's like building a model of something, and right when you're about to put the last piece in place, after you spent all that energy building it, it shatters into a thousand pieces. Still... despite that, I'm in another corp, so I should be doing better...

Well... I need sleep for tomorrow, so I'm calling it a night... also, a certain someone needs to update their blog..

Post Coming Soon...

2007-11-19T00:36:00.000-05:00

With finals coming soon, some shake ups in EvE, and my general self esteem at a low, I haven't had time to post =(. I should be posting soon though, probably the Friday after thanksgiving...

All Things Scary on All Hallow's EvE

2007-10-26T12:27:00.000-04:00

Ya, another post, with out a two month delay. Hopefully I'll try to be a little less emo in this one then I was in the previous one...

Halloween's coming, and I really don't have anything to do for it. No clubs that I'm a part of our doing anything for Halloween =(, and and I currently lack the friend base to be able to throw/attend a Halloween party and enjoy it. Oh, and I also don't have a costume. Though, on the plus side, the local anime club s throwing a Halloween Murder Mystery thing on Sunday that I might attend. I'm not really a member of their club because their meetings are on Saturday nights, which is when I'm back at my parents to work =(. Though I do have an invite to it, since I am on the their facebook account, so if I leave early enough on Sunday from home after work, I'll be attending the Murder Mystery thing to give me something to do for Halloween. After all, Halloween is my favorite holiday of the year.

I'm doing a little bit better in my classes than I was in my last post, but not by much =(. I have a physics test come Wednesday that I'm not ready for. You know all that abstract atomic theory about the quantinization of matter and light? That's what it's going to be on. And the things I hate most about physics is atomic structure and nuclear physics =(. Though I'll probably be spending a good portion of my time studying over the weekend, minus that anime thing I want to do...

I have discovered that the greatest determent to my time at the moment is EvE. But, I really don't want to quit playing. It is my largest joy here in Orlando... well, may not my largest, but it is something I really enjoy doing. And it's not so much the space flight thingy (though I do love sci-fi) as it is a combination of having people to talk to (even if their only online) and being able to have more control over my character's outcomes than I do in the real world. Not that I don't control my real life, it's just that... I have a lot more freedom in EvE than I do in the real world. It is fairly easy to be something in EvE, not that it's difficult to do it in the RL, just... I don't know. I just enjoy it more I guess... And as such, I am really reluctant to part to part with it. Maybe I should, but...

There is a guy here I am interested in, but I don't think he's interested in me the same way I'm interested in him... at least, I don't think so. Still, he's interested in anime, gaming, and programming, so that should be a decent connection there. Though it might be more like he's free on the weekends, and I'm not =(. Stupid job with my parents. I did ask if he was free Wednesday night (you know, after my physics test), and he said it looked ok so far, but that he can't be certain till Tuesday, which doesn't sound too good to me =(. Still, hoprefully me and him can get together to watch some anime or something. And if that goes well, we might be able to meet up a little more often and become something more than friends. Hopefully... maybe...

Anyway, I have class soon, so I need to log and attend that. I'll try to post later in the week...

OK, it might have been a while since I did an update

2007-10-10T00:26:00.000-04:00

I've been very busy... class and work don't leave me a lot of free time to do other things, and most of the time that I had, I ended up spending on EvE, though I'm changing that.

It's not because I don't like EvE, far from it. In fact, right now, since I don't have a lot of friends here in Orlando, and my job with my Dad's friend has no coworkers (except my Dad's friend), EvE has basicly been my sole enjoyment here, which is kind of sad, since it seems I'm now using a virtual world to be happy...

But as to why I'm greatly decreasing the amount of free time I'm spending on EvE, it's because my grades aren't as good as I'd like them to be. I was one point from a C on my Diffrential Equations exam, and I did fairly horrible on my physics test (I only had answers for 3 out of 5 questions...). I'm also not keeping up with my homework, which is pretty bad considering the level of difficulty of the classes.

But the worst part isn't that. It's my attention span in my classes. I'll be attempting to pay attention in a class, and trying to focus on what the professor is saying, when my mind will go on a complete tangent and diverge in thought process to something completely random. And I'll do this multiple times in the lecture! So, by the end of the class I really didn't learn anything new. Though I wouldn't say I'm completely lost in my classes. I just... I don't know. And I think it's kind of depression related to why I can't seem to pay attention.

I mean, I don't really have anyone I consider to be a friend friend. I know a few people in my classes that I'm friendly with, and I enjoy hanging out with them, but our relationship pretty much ends with school. We'll occasionally hit an on-campus resturant after class, but as to us really going out of our way to do something, like hanging out in the evening or something, we don't. So, the only people I can really talk to after class gets out and I'm not at work are my corp mates on EvE, and I'll largely just talk to them because I don't have too many others to talk to.

As to Sean and I, well, I haven't talked to him in about a month and a half, so our relationship is pretty much over. And I know that he's at least OK enough to be able to log online, because his myspace page's last log in time keeps changing, so I think it's largely because he doesn't want to talk with me/be with me. I wouldn't feel as crappy about it if he gave me a reason why he didn't want to see me. Though either way, it still hurts. Even now.. when it first started, I wanted to find some way to make him feel the same way that he was making me feel. I didn't want to hurt him hurt him, because I still (even now) like him, I just wanted to make him know what that felt like, though I never enacted it. Of course, it's stupid of me to think that way. I mean, if he's out, and has found someone else that can make him happier than I could, than that would be ok I guess, I just wish I didn't feel like sobbing everytime I thought about this. And thinking about it makes me feel so... unwanted. And afraid of being single again... and a thousand other negative emotions that I don't like having. And to make things worse, when I think that maybe I shouldn't have ever dated him, my mind goes back and thinks about the times we cuddled (just cuddled!) and spent together, and I just want that back. I want to have someone I can embrace again, some one I can hug and hang onto, some one who, just... I don't know... obviously he wasn't it.

Gina's and I's relationship isn't going as well as I'd like it to be, though she's in Melborn and I'm in Orlando. She's attending FIT, though there she's gotten herself into a sorority. I don't mind that she has people to hang out with, and I'm happy and maybe a little jealous that she's made a lot of friends out there, but sometimes it just feels like she's putting a priority towards her sorority over me. Like, back when we were both going to MCC, I tried to get her to play Guitar Hero, since we both were in the orchestra and both enjoyed playing our respective instruments (I played the violin, she played the viola). She tried it out for one song, put it down, and said she didn't like it, so we never touched it again. But now that her sorority is doing an event with it, she's willing to engage in it with them... that's just one example... though I probably haven't been as good a friend to her as I should be. I really don't call her on a regular basis, so I guess it's acceptable that we're kind of drifting apart. It's just bad for me since she's one of the closest people I have in my life at the moment. And I don't want to loose my friendship with her.

Getting off of the topic on how I'm screwing up my personal life, if you haven't yet looked into it, go out and do what ever you can to watch as much Death Note as you can get your hands on. I've been able to see the first 9 episodes of it so far, and it is a fantastic anime. It is a very intense thriller, and when it finally finds it's way to the States (and I'm not talking about the dubbing crap they're going to put on Adult Swim, I'm talking about a good Sub), I'm going to be one of the first people to buy the series on DvD. I don't know what it is about the anime, I just can't get enough of it. Even though the plot synopsis doesn't sound too interesting (boy finds magic notebook that'll kill anyone who's name is written inside of it), it's worth the watch. And the own.

Anyway, I need to get some sleep for physics and work tomorrow. ~Night!

Better than expectations

2007-08-23T22:02:00.000-04:00

So the job up here in Orlando was better than I predicted. It's not a bad job, and the distance isn't as far as I originally thought. It's only about thirty minutes from my dorm, or 14 miles. My manager is a decent, friendly, nice person (most of the time), and the work isn't that difficult, well, at least not for me. And the pay is a little better than the job I have with my parents. I mean, I feel ok about the job, and I'm kind of glad the manager isn't a bad person. It's also only 2 days a week, and the owner is always trying to figure out ways to write off lunch to the company account (yay! Free food for me). So I guess it's a pretty good job.

First day of school was Monday, and so far it's going pretty well. Though it's a 30 minute walk from my dorm to my class. That hasn't bothered me yet, though I think I need comfier sandals. It's gotten so hot on the pavement that it's melted the top part of my sandals, and it has completely ruined all comfiness.

What's bothered my so far though is the lack of friends I have up here. I've been trying to join a few clubs, but so far I haven't seen any of the meetings yet... and my room mate isn't too talkative of a person, so I don't get my socializing from them. To make things worse, I'm use to the close nit classes of a community college, where everyone in the class meets and talks to everyone else in the class, and by the end of the first week everyone knows everyone else's name. That's not how it is here. My smallest class has 50 students, while my C Programing class has 219 students. So I'll find someone to talk to one day, but the next day I won't be able to find them again due to the number of people in the class (well, Differential Equations, the 50 student class, doesn't count, but no one talks before or after the class... I think it's for antisocial people). So I've been feeling kind of lonely up here.

On top of that, I haven't been able to spend time with Sean at all =(. I've only been able to catch him online once or twice over the week, and we're trying to plan something on Friday so I can cuddle with him again, but I haven't heard back from him yet, and it's Thursday night. I like him a lot... I do. We share similar interests, and dating him means that at least I have someone... but that doesn't mean much when you never see each other. And before you ask, no, we haven't done anything more than cuddle, though that's largely due to the fact I haven't physically seen him enough to do more than that.

Anyway, I'm going to call it a night. I have class tomorrow morning... and I'm not feeling too uppity at the moment to continue typing.

Lightining

2007-08-13T01:16:00.000-04:00

Ok, first off sorry about the bland color scheme, I'm currently at home at the moment, writing this up on my mother's laptop, so I don't have the nifty link that displays all of my favorite hex color codes, so right now the color style is set to pink (I perfer to use fusia, since all you get under pink is buble gum pink, and I'm not too big of a fan of that color. I think it's a little too pink.) Also, my mom's laptop's keyboard is a lot less sensetive than my own computer's keyboard is, which means there will probably be mre stupid typos than there normaly are. Now, some of you might ask why I don't look up hex colors to get the color I want, or to proof read this when I finish, and the answer to that is, I'm lazy.

I really wish I could use my compute, but right now it's up in Orlando in my dorm, and I'm trapped here in Manatee county helping my parents with their station. I kind of don't want to be here, espically because everything I use for entrtainment is up in Orlando (TV, Computer, Anime, DS). I do have my 360, but with out a TV it's kind of useless. On the plus side I did get to spend a little bit of time with my friends, which was kind of cool. Except that Gina's grandfather just recently passes away, which is never a good thing. She kind of takes stress badly, and even though she was expecting him to pass away, she not coping too well about it. Part of it may be because he was e only father figure she had, and I'm sure there are oter reasons as well. I just wish there was something I could do for her, something to help her with this. I mean, it was bad when my Grandmother died, so I kind of know what she's going through, but on the other side of it, I don't, since I didn't live with my Grandmother. All I can really do to help Gina through this is to talk to her about all this, and to ty to chear her up through some of the non-sential jokes I make, but even then it just doesn't feel like enough, and I just... don't want her to feel bad.

As to work, well,over the last 3 days I've been there 30 hours,, which I guess isn't too bad. I mean, it could be more like 40 hours, which it pobably might have if I hadn't of taken prt of today of (I did beause we had three people on schedule, and the store can elly only use 2 people.)But what made the last coupl of days worse was the fact that yesterday (well, Saturday for all you people who believe tha midnight starts a new day) we got hit with lightning, which took our gas pumps down, along with our ablity to take credit and debit purchases, the car wash, and two of our neon lights. Since then, all we've managed to get fixed is the gas pumps. I just..... kind of.... feel powerless agains th. It's not the actual lighting that mkes me fel that way, or the fact that everything is "crispy". It's that, despite my technical knowledge, I can not repair it. And it's largely because I don't have the parts to do so. But it's also the technicians who come out and do the repair work. I just think they have a low opinion of the people who work at places like my place. Not that I don't are their opinion, but... I mean, there's really nothing I can do to assist them, and offering them help at best gives you a polite refusal. It's just that... and I know that my manager would probably not report any of the major issues to the repair companies. When gas and credit gets taken off line for a while, it's never good. And I don't think my manager would have called immediatly about it... I think he would have waited till Monday to do so, and even then, he probably would have waited till Monday evening. I mean, I've seen him not order important products for WEEKS because he just forgets about it or doesn't notice it, or.... I don't know. I know there are warranty issues and rebates worth thousands of dollars that he hasn't snt in, and he's had since the store opened to do it. But he's a good guy, just kind of out of it... and I don't like speaking ill of him, since I know he tries pretty hard at what he does. It's just... in the professional department, I don't have as much respect for him as I should for someone of his standing.

I have the job with my father's friend pretty muh lined up, all I need to do is call him tomorrow. I don't want to ork for him though, and it's for a mixture of reasons. It has nothing to do with him though, for so far he seems like a decent fellow. It's that his buisness is like 20 miles from my dorm, and I really don't want to travel that far just to go to work, espically when there are at least 2 bestbuys and a circuit city with in 5 miles of my dorm. The other reason why I don't want to work for him is that, with the exception of my time at Wyman, Green, & Blalock, I haven't been able to choose my employment. When I worked at Albertson's, I worked tere because my father thought it would be a good place for me to work. Now, I'm workig at the gas station because of him, and I'll be working for his friend because he thinks it'll be good. And it's not that I don't think it wil be, I mean, I'm probably going to learn more about programing, espcally for Databases and Scripting langauges, than I would have the opportunity to in any other place of employment currently available to me, except, maybe, a paid internship. And, that's not bad. It's just... I don't like being forced to work somewhere, because it kind of feels like slave labor. I'll get paid, but it's in the freedom to choose employment, and not just the pay, that I care about, of course, that might be because of my lack of big bills.

And then there's the "What if I screw something up... majorly" queston? I mean, this is one of my Dad's friends I'm working for, and if I screw up big time, it'll look really bad on his part. And even if I were to manage to somehow fix it, it's stll a strike against my family... at least in some big corporation one can screw something up, fix it, then leave for a new place. You can't fix a problem with friends that easily. And then there's also the fact that since I'm working for my dad's friend, it kind of feels like my Dad doubts my ability to get a job upon my own merits, and that, for some reason, he thinks I can't land my own job. And that's what I'm going to think about everytime I make the 20 mile comute.

Anyway, I need to get some sleep, I have to head back to Orlando tomorrow morning. So ~Night!

To Orlando!

2007-08-08T18:55:00.000-04:00

Well, I'm now in Orlando. The move went fairly smooth, with nothing bad happening. Got almost everything up here that I need (I still need to bring one or two things when I go back home.) I'll be heading back on home Thursday night though, since I'm still working for my parents on the weekends (once school is in session, I'll be traveling home Friday nights and returning Sunday evenings.)

My room mate is pretty cool... at least, my room mate is a fairly laid back person. So far, all they've really done is watched TV. I'm not too big of a TV fan myself though, so I haven't been spending too much time with them.

On one hand I'm kind of happy that my room mate is the indifferent type, because that means I don't have to worry about too many people coming in and out of our room at all hours of the day. Neither of us has had any one over in the dorm room yet, though my sisters are stopping by tonight. Also, since they're pretty indifferent, I don't need to worry too much about my habits offending them, and that's always a good thing, espically since this is the first time I've shared living space with another person (I've always had my own room back home.)

On the other hand though, my room mate and I don't have a lot in common, which is probably a bad thing. They're not into gaming, or anime, or some of the other geeky, nerdy stuff I've found enjoyable. In fact, their PC is worse than mine, it's a small machine still running Windows 98. So my room mate isn't much of a Technophile. On the plus side though, my room mate does seem honest, so I can't fault that.

I've also been kind of homesick since I've arrived here, and today is only the second day I've been up here (I moved in on Tuesday). I kind of miss the familiar surroundings of home, and although I've written on numerous occasions, I kind of miss my family (ya, I know, I complain about them a lot.) I also miss my friends. I've already called a few of them up multiple times today, since I know they all had today off. I don't want to use up what little cell phone minutes I have though, so I'm waiting till 8 to call them again.

I also miss my boyfriend... =(. I didn't get to see him last week, so it's been like, 3 or 4 weeks since I last saw him, and he's having computer problems at the moment =(. Sometimes I think he isn't as into me as I am into him, but he does email me from a friend's computer every one or two days, so that kind of makes up for it. Unless it's all a ruse, but he hasn't been on some of our mutual sites for a little over a week, so that means either his computer is broken, or he's avoiding the sites I know he visits. I'm hoping it's the former...

I had to do some repair work on my computer before I could get internet access on it. My computer's hard drive crashed about one or two months ago, and I had to replace it. When I replaced it, rather than assigning the drive to C: like most computers do, for some reason it assigned it to I: . Now, that's not bad in itself, but I had to download the ethernet drivers for my PC yesterday using a public machine. I go to install them, and I get a fatal error. Apparently, the default HP ethernet drivers only install to C:. So ya, I had to pick up a new ethernet card to get internet working again. Before this, I always used a USB wireless adapter... no such luck here I guess.

Anyway, I need to log... so ~Night!

Glargh, Bimonthly

2007-07-29T10:34:00.000-04:00

I don't want this to become a bi-monthly post, but with the way things are going it looks like that's how my blog is going to end up. I kind of wanted it to be, at worst, a weekly post, but I guess a combination of work, EvE, and my friends, have conspisired to prevent me from being able to post as often as I'd wish... or maybe it's just that I'm lazy or weary after work and don't really wish to explain everything at 2 or 3 in the morning. Either way, I'm hoping that, when I leave for school, I'll be able to get this blog back up to a weekly post.

Speaking of that, my housing contract starts on the 7th of August, which means I'm going to be busy packing stuff up. Then there will be a long car ride to Orlando with other family members, and hopefully I'll be able to unpack everything and have a nice room mate. I hope my room mate is nice, and has a similar personality to mine. I mean, I don't want a room mate I don't get along with, and even though I like my privacy, I also don't want a room mate who's never there. I want one who's there, who's fun to be with, and has a similar personality to mine. What I don't want is one of those room mates only interested in partying and drinking.

I probably should have mentioned this earlier, but Will was down for about 2 weeks. He's already left again. I didn't spend much time with him, since I was working and his family wanted to spend time with him again. It was nice to see him again, espically since I won't be able to see him again till the middle of next year, but, I don't know. It's just, every day it seems he gets a little more nerdy, and I get a little less nerdy. The things we enjoyed back in Highschool, IE, things like DnD and some video games, I enjoy less, while he's getting more into comic books and roleplaying. I don't know... I guess we don't have similar interests anymore.

As to my boyfriend and I, well, first off, all we've done is cuddled. We haven't done anything more than that, so you can get you mind out of the gutter. Of course, the reason why might be because we've only been able to cuddle in the back of my car, and not someplace a little more private, but we still haven't done any unspeakable acts yet! Actually, he went up to Maryland for a week for Otakon, and he just got back down. I'm hoping to meet up with him on Wednesday to spend some more time with him. I do really miss him. He's just been busy since he's gotten back, and that hasn't been good for me =(.

Anyway, I need to get ready for work... I'll try posting again before the end of the month, but I doubt I'll be able to.

I've been lazy

2007-07-10T12:05:00.000-04:00

I've been lazy, and I haven't posted in about a month. Not that there has been much for me to post about. For the last month or two, my life has basically consisted of three things: working, hanging out with friends at a diner, or playing EvE. Not that I mind those three things, but...

Well, those three things aren't the only things I've been up to really... I did go to my cousin's wedding about a month ago. The wedding itself was nice. It was all out doors in a beautiful location. The thing that I didn't like about everything though was my family. I really can only take them in small doses most of the time, and spending about 8 days with them is a little bit more than a small dose. It's not that I don't love them, but.... just something about them, espically my father, gets on my nerves. I'm not that only one in my family with the issue though. In the car wide up there, a few comments my dad made to Catherine made her burst into tears, and he's not on speaking terms with his parents. They each have their own problems with each other though, so that more of a mutual thing. We actually almost left the day before the ceremony because of an argument my father had with his brother and his parents... just realized that I already posted about the wedding, and that this post now seems a bit redundant...

I did go to metrocon on Saturday. The con itself would have been insanely fun... had I someone to go with. Instead, I ended up going by myself, because Gina had a wedding to go to, and Aaron had to work. I don't know if Aaron tried to get the con day off, I don't think he did, so I'm kind of upset with him at leaving me alone at the con, but I don't have any issue with Gina at the moment. Actually, out of all my friends, I probably trust her the most with information about myself and being honest to me and being there when I need her. But... the con.... I ended up annoying the people at the art booths because I didn't have anyone to do anything with. I would talk to a few people who passed me by, but I didn't really find any group of people to converse with at the con. I started to feel really lonely at the con around 2ish, and left at 3. I'm also kind of upset that my boyfriend wasn't able to go with me either... but he's going to Otakon and is taking 10 days off for that, so I doubt his work would have given him the time off. I'm also kind of angry with myself for not having more people to go to these things with. But that's just me...

As to my Boyfriend and I, I just wish I could spend more time with him than once a week. He lives in Wesley Chapel, I live in manatee county, so we end up meeting halfway in Tampa... which is 35 miles away =(. I just think about him a lot, and wish I could spend more time with him. And then he's going to otakon I think next week, so I won't be able to see him for a week =(. I just like being held by him, or holding him, or nibbling on his ear... =P. We found a hospital parking lot in Tampa that we like to cuddle in, since it's open 24/7, is safe, and has no security... unlike the malls in tampa, which aren't safe and have annoying security guards getting angry at you for taking up a parking space for 3 hours... it's our fault we don't have anywhere else to cuddle =(.

Anyway, I need to log for work, and with me not having written a blog post for a month, this all seems too choppy and difficult to read. So I'm going to log... ~Night!

Crash and Burn

2007-06-12T23:30:00.000-04:00

I'm not in a good mood at the moment =(, and there's a lot of reasons for that. The number one reason is that my Hard Drive crashed. Which meant I ended up spending three hundred dollars to replace both the drive and the OS. The reason why I needed to replace the OS was that HP is cheap, and instead of sending me an OS disc with the PC, they instead put the OS files on a separate partition on the drive.

I have other things too that I kind of want to complain about, but I do currently have it better than one of my friends, at least, according to his blog.I have a job (although not the one I would like to have), and I have been accepted at the University of Central Florida, so I am doing pretty well in the whole skeem of things. But still, I have reasons, some of which I haven't posted here. Still, I wish i could make him feel better... I'd post a comment, but I don't think I could offer anything useful. Instead, I'd either sound like some sort of cheap, motivational poster, or I'd sound like some too helpful person that needs to be smacked. Either way, I don't want to sound like that.

As to my hard drive, I lost a good deal amount of information. I had a few short stories that I wrote but never backed up, which I miss, I had a sample resume that I need for my next job, I had some flash software... but one of the worst lost that I had on it was the 15 gigs of AMV's. Ya, I know, they're just AMV's, but... I don't know. I want to say they cheer me up when I'm not feeling to happy, but there's more (and less) to that. I get to see other people's works, and I get to be exposed to new anime and new music. But there's also a community of people who make those things, and although I'm not actively making them, I'm at least a part of it when I download and write lengthy opinions about the videos.

Another reason why I'm unhappy is Gina said something to me last night. I'm not going to go into what she said, but it just upset me... still does. Anything in that category of comments makes me feel horrible, but I don't have the heart to tell her because I don't want her to feel bad, and I don't want to tell her which comment it was that made me feel the way I currently do because I don't want to lose her honesty with me. I value honesty, at least, I usually do. But still, it hurt...

Then there's the long ride with my parents to and from Virgina to see my cousin's wedding. I love my family, but I can only take them in limited doses. My Dad can just be a jerk. And of course, the only conversation my family had was about the station, and I hate that place. Hate hate hate hate hate! HATE! I'm forced to work there, I'm surrounded by people I dislike, management is a bunch of idiots, and... I don't know. There's more to that than that... but I'm getting off topic. The trip was not what I'd consider enjoyable. Espically because I couldn't get a decent amount of sleep (crappy hotel rooms and sleeping on a couch). Or because my Dad doesn't get along with his parents or his sister. But my uncle and his children are good people, so I wish them the best.

Right now I'm reinstalling EvE. I like EvE online, but I don't think it's because of the actual game play. I think it's because it makes a better glorified chat channel than CoH does, and because I enjoy crafting. I don't like PvP though, and that's a major side of the game, but... As to that, my corp is thinking about merging with another corp because no one is ever on in my corp. Now, I might be the one leading this idea, but I don't know if it'sgone through yet, due to the wedding =(. I just... want more people to talk to in that game, and in real life...

Speaking of that, I might have found a boyfriend. Might. Our first date is tomorrow, so hopefully he likes cuddling. We're going to meet up at the University Mall in Tampa, and from there we might try to find a quiet place elsewhere in Tampa for some talking and Cuddling. He's kind of cute, and he's heavily into anime =). Wish me luck!

Anyway. I think I've spent a little too much time rambling about different things, so I'm going to call it a night.

Busy! Busy! Busy!

2007-05-26T00:48:00.001-04:00

OK, I apologize for the lack of color, shortness, and other problems (ie, delay since last post) this post has. No, I have not fallen off of the face of the earth. I've been somewhat busy... I've been working over time at the station, been trying to spend some time with friends, had Orientation to go to for UCF, and I met a friend from one of the forums I visted. So ya... I've been a wee bit busy.

As to my classes, they are Diffrential Equations, Statistics for Engineers, Physics 3, and C programming.

Also Been Busy trying to find housing and finacial Aid. My classes start August 20th, and the housing I found requires me to move in August 7th. Hopefully I'll be ready by then...

Also, I'm not going to A-kon with Will due to time and finaces... =(.

First Post of May

2007-05-03T13:03:00.000-04:00

OK, maybe I didn't get to meet my goal of four posts last month, but I should be able to do it this month...

One of the reasons why I wasn't able to was because of a combination of work and finals. Over the weekend before finals I worked something like 30 hours... so I didn't have too much free time =(. I also didn't have too much (err... not at all) study time. So you can imagine how I did on my physics and chemistry exams (I know I got a B overall in Physics... I'm just afraid of chemistry now... History I had a 105% for my final grade...).

It doesn't help that Regina was having a nevouress breakdown because of her Physics final either... she did really bad on the test (worse than I did), so that night I had to keep her away from sharp objects. She's doing a lot better today, but... =(.

I'm kind of angry at Aaron... apparnetly he met someone back at Megacon, and didn't tell me about her. The only reason why I found out about their relationship was because she called him to break up with him while we were out together. I'm somewhat upset that she broke up with him, but I'm even more upset about the fact that he didn't tell me about their relationship

It's been a few days since the top part of this post, and in that time I went to Jacon... and dyed my hair a color similar to the line above... Glarg... I'll just give Jacon it's own post... still too sleepy

A before work post

2007-04-26T13:27:00.000-04:00

Blogging before work... after this one I'm going to try to post one more post before the end of April. I can then at least pretend I'm back to one post every week...

I finally got my mirror repaired on my truck. The guy's insurance company paid for everything, so I didn't have to do any out of pocket expense, which is a good thing =). I also didn't get pulled over for having a broken mirror, which is also good.

Finals are next week for me. I'm not too worried about them, well, if I actually study for them I won't be too worried. Right now though I know there are a few things on my physics and chemistry exams that I'll need to go over, and I might not have a chance to do that this week end due to work... ya I'm picking up more hours at the station =(.

The reason for that isn't because I'm getting out of school soon (though that's what my family probably thinks.) The reason is that Will has invited me to go to A-Con with him in the first of June, and if I'm going to go, I'll need to get airplane tickets. He'll probably make the hotel reservations, so I won't need to worry about getting that money before the middle of May, but I will need to worry about getting the air fare and the money for a weekend pass to the convention before the middle of May.

I know it's probably a bad time for me to go to a convention, but it's not about the convention. It's about seeing him again before he gets deployed back into Iraq. June is probably the last month I'll have the time to go visit him, since I'll probably be moving in July, getting seatlled in August, and from September till Christmass I'll probably be at UCF, to engrossed in my studies to be able to take 2 or three days off (and not to mention the living expensies.) I want to see him badly, and since he'll be doing a fifthteen month tour in Iraq, I don't want to wait two years to see him again. Of course, I could always bombard him with emails, but that's not nearly as good as seeing him again.

Anyway, I need to log for work. I'll try to do one more post before the end of the month (one with in 4 days?!). ~Night!

Edit: Forgot to post this before work =(

Loveless

2007-04-14T21:27:00.000-04:00

Well, I'm now 21, and I still haven't used any of the new, 21+ privalages that comes with being 21. Out of my friends, only Will hasn't turned 21 yet, so I'm not the youngest in my group of friends =).

I've been watching the anime Loveless, and it's a very well done anime. Excellent artwork, good music, plot, and character devolpment. My complaint about it is that it's only 12 episodes long, and I'm currently on episode 11. Of course, the manga is still going (currently to volume 4 in the US, something like 7 in Japan), so I've picked up the first volume.

I apologize if this entry seems a little choppy, I've been reading a new webcomic that a friend showed me. The web comic falls under the same category as some of the anime I've been watching, so, some of it is.... ummm.... kind of... I don't want to say wrong or distrubing because of their conotation, but... ya... the webcomic Pandect could be considered those two things. On the plus side, the number of webcomics I have bookmarked has now risen to 14 =). Just wish I could find a good one that updates on Wednessdays.

It's a few days after I started this post, and I have just finished Loveless about ten minutes ago (wish I could finish a book I feel I need to read as fast as I could finish anime). The last episode was good! Very good! But it wasn't an ending!!!!!!!!!!!!! It just... and.... glarg!!! The anime ends with a cliff hanger! Ok... I need to stop complaining about the ending. Hopefully the manga will have a better ending. At least I'll be able to watch all those Loveless AMVs that I downloaded with out fear of spoilers.

I've been playing puzzlequest while I haven't been playing Eve. The reason is that you need a little bit more innutive and a little bit more motivation in Eve then in any other game I've ever played, and I haven't had it. Instead, I've been doing a few things that are less... involved. As you can tell, that's things like anime, AMVs, and games with set objectives. I also haven't been able to progress too far with my studies... =(. I'll go to study, pull out my books, paper, and pencil, and I'll just sit there for fifthteen minutes just staring at the closed text book, not being able to bring out enough energy to open it and study. Unless the assignment is due the next day, in which case I'll finish the assignment at 3 or 4 am (not being able to start it till about midnight) and spend the rest of the night staring at my ceiling while I wait for sleep to over take me. It's starting to feel like high school again, and that was probably the worse time of my life.

Anyway, I'm going to get some sleep real quick. hopefully I'll post by next Wednessday... ~Night!

Slowly getting back on track

2007-04-01T12:20:00.000-04:00

Slowly trying to get back on track with normal a normal, weekly, posting schedule. Don't know if that's going to happen or not, but I'll try.

Well, my father turned 47 on the 31st of March, and I'll be turning 21 on the 11th of April. I don't plan on using the new privilage granted to 21 year olds. I'm not a big fan of drinking, and I view that I'm loud and obnoiux sober, so what would I be intoxicated?

Still, turning 21 will be kind of depressing (it kind of already has been...). I do not really know why it depresses me, but it kind of does. Anyway...

My car was parked at work yesterday, and a truck swiped the driver side mirror off my vehicle. Luckily, the guy was honest and gave me his insurance information and contact information. I just wish his insurance company would contact me, since it's unlawfull to drive with out a driver side mirror, and I don't really want another ticket! (Since I've gotten my licence, I've had 3 tickets, one for an accident, one for not wearing a seat belt, and one for a crack in my windshield. I don't want, need, or could afford, a fourth one.)

I've been spending less time playing Eve and other games (hehe, except maybe Castlevania, Symphany of the nights). Instead, I've been watching a combination of Anime and AMVs. My friends and I have been watching Chobits together, while I've been watching Loveless. The reason why I haven't been watching loveless with my friends is that Aaron is kind of... creeped out by Shonen-Ai type of anime. I personally think it's kind of cute. Anyway, after I get done with Loveless, I'll begin watching Gravitation, which is another anime that Aaron will refuse to watch. Though after Chobits Aaron, Gina, and I will probably end up watching chobits. And the best part is is that I have found a local anime warehouse to supply me with my much wanted anime =).

Hehe, and before I decide to post, I found this person to be lagging in their gamerscore...

Anyway, I need to get ready for work, and if I don't post now it'll be sitting in my to post list for about a week... so ~night!

Been busy

2007-03-24T13:18:00.000-04:00

Been kind of busy recently, but I'd be lying if I said that was the reason why I haven't posted anything in a few weeks. As you can see from my last couple of posts, I haven't been too much into posting recently, and I don't know why. I mean, when I'm away from my computer, or away from home, or away from a computer, I'll want to post and update my blog, I'll want to chronical my life, but then I'll get home, sit down at my computer, start typing the next blog entry, then get one paragraph through before I close down my blog and quit for the day. It's kind of annoying, espically since it's starting to follow into my school work =(.

Well, as to some of the new stuff in my life, my sisters each got a tatoo. They both got stars on their ankels, one blue, the other green. My Dad got really upset with them over it. He has a very negative, conservative, view point on tatoos, so when he found out that two of his daughters got tatoos, well, he wasn't too happy. As to my oen viewpoint about their tatoos, I don't really care too much, it's their skin. But I do think they were some what daft for doing it while still living in my father's house.

All though I could post more, I want to get this posted before I loose more interest =(. This is my third time on this same page, so I haven't been doing too well tonight....

Tomorrow can be a long time

2007-03-13T18:31:00.000-04:00

I apologize for the long time since my last post. I've been kind of busy recently, with a combination of mid terms and papers. But now it's spring break, so I should have a little more free time than I ussually do. This probably means that the hours I log on EvE, and the hours I work, will both go up for this week.

The biggest thing that occured this week (other than the midterms, gah I hope I didn't do too poorly on my physics test) was that we had someone be assualted at the station. I hope the person was OK, and we're doing what we can to provide the police with evidence of the event, including copying the video cameras.

Outside of that event, I don't have much else going on right now, though I do plan on posting again in the very near future (ya, I know, I wrote that last week), so ~Night.

Not Dead Yet

2007-03-03T23:33:00.000-05:00

Contrary to popular belief, I have not fallen off the face of the earth. Instead, I've been kind of busy, and kind of lazy. Right now I have 3 tests pending on Wednessday, a research paper due Thursday, and I have just finished doing a research project for chemistry on Hydrogen Fuel Cells. Add to all that a part time job that schedules me like I'm full time, and an addiction to EVE, and well, time isn't something I have a lot of right now.

My community college has started up a gamer's club, and I have found myself in it. The first meeting was last Monday, which we spent playing Unreal Tournament on the school computers, and the school computers are really nice. A good graphics card plus 2GB of RAM. As to the people in the club, they're your standard geeky group, with similar likes in anime and gaming as myself have. Hopefully I can get an officer position in the club before I leave for UCF so I have some sort of important sounding extrcuricular activity on my transcript. I want to show the world that I'm serious about goofing off =P.

My friends and I are currently trying to get enough funds together to go to JaCon in May. It's another convention in Orlanda, though not nearly as big as Megacon. It's also almost entierly Anime focused, though in 2005 they had the people from Red Vs Blue there. I'm hoping it'll be a good time, though since we want to stay for two days, we'll need to save up for a hotel room or two =(. It's not until May though, so we have some time to save up.

Anyway, I'm going to get some sleep. I'm planning on posting again tomorrow after work though, so ~Night!

Return from Megacon...

2007-02-20T23:31:00.000-05:00

Well, I'm back from Megacon, and it was a lot of fun. I got to get signed pics from both Brian Clevinger (from 8-bit theater ) and Tim Buckley (from crtl alt del ). Out of the two of them, I'm going to say that Brian was by far a lot more friendly and a lot more enthusiastic towards the crowds. Tim just kind of seemed... disintrested. Still, I'm happy to have met both of them, and I got to steal their souls with my camera... =). I also got a bunch of signed prints from both of them, so that's good too.

I went to the convention wearing my foxtail, and I picked up a chocker with a bell on it and another set of cat ears to add to my "costume". It really wasn't that good of a costume, but I did get one person to ask me for my picture =). There's another convention coming to Orlando in April, so I hope to have a decent Cosplay outfit by then, since I'm hoping to attend.

Outside of the above, my friends and I also got to meet the people from red vs blue , we got to see numerous people in cosplay, and the winners of the AMV contest (we didn't realize there was more than one room being used in the convention hall until near the end time of that conteast, so we missed the bulk of the AMV's =(. )The people from Reaper minis also had a room there where one could walk in, pick up a free model, use their free paint, and walk out with your creation. So of course, we painted minis too. I'm just kind of unhappy that I couldn't do anything with shading (only had like 4 colors there, so I ended up mixing my own), but a free model is a free model...

Also, my wallet now hates me. Apparently they had cheep anime there, including the Excel Saga (so wanted to watch that), Chobits (the only place that sold it in my area had to close because the mall they were in had a deal with another company on DVDs, so I've only seen the first volume), and Hellsing (hey, I like horror...), so naturally those anime found their way into my collection. Unfortunately, after all the costs were totaled, I basicly left one paycheck in Orlando. Luckily, I had the foresight to put money away for all my bills before I left. Well, except gas, but I was able to borrow ten bucks off of Aaron for that.

As to Xboxlive and my Xboxlive gamer tag, I'll think about giving that out, though at the moment, I'm in no hurry to post it on my blog. Besides, I'm far more often mining asteroids on EVE than I am on live, which is a shame because Viva Pinata is such a good game. As to must have games for the 360, I'd recommend Oblivian for its single player, Gears of War for its Multiplayer (single player has no story or character development =(. ), Dead Rising for the Zombie Killing, and Viva Pinata for something just plain fun. As to what to get on the Arcade, Geometry Wars; Retro Evolved is good, Luminous is decent, Outpost Kutimost (Or something like that) is a pretty intresting strategy game, assualt heroes is a neat shoot em up, and any retro game you enjoyed a while back. Also, when it comes out, you might also want to pick up Catan as another strategy game, since the board game was very fun.

Anyway, I know the bulk of this post was a quick summary of megacon, but I need to call it a night. ~Night!

It's a Mega Con....

2007-02-15T13:10:00.000-05:00

Well, to start things off, this Saturday I'm going to Orlando with two of my friends to hopefully get into Megacon. It'll be my first anime/gaming convention.... yay! Some of my favorite web comic artists will be there, so hopefully I might be able to pick up some prints of their stuff. We're only going to be their Saturday, and we're probably going to leave at around 7 or 8 to get back since Aaron needs to get some sleep because he works early Sunday morning. But still, it should be fun. Besides, their will be cosplayers (for once I'll be able to wear my foxtail with out being the center of attention), AMV's, webcomics, a Warhammer 40k tournament, and over priced anime novelties through out the convention.

Anyway, I would like to post a lot more, but since I'm leaving in the morning at 6am (going to pick up friends to stand in line in orlando), I need to log. I'll write again after I get back.

The Brandenburg-Prussian Empire

2007-02-09T12:23:00.000-05:00

Well, first off, I'm feeling better than when I was in my last post. I'm in a better mood, and I'm not soley whistling the theme to MASH at work anymore, to the joy of my coworkers. Of course, they'd like it if I were to stop whistling altogether, but, well, I enjoy whistling too much to stop in the near future.

I do have something new to whistle there, since I recently picked up the Brandenburg Conceretos. I know I normally listen to metal (it is power metal though), but I've been in the mood to listen to some classical, and since it's been a while since I heard them (the last time being in my High School Orchestra) I kind of wanted to hear them again. Out of them, 3 and 5 are probably my two favorites (I enjoyed playing three a while back), I'm not too big on the slower movements, but they're enjoyable to listen to. I also need to burn the albumn for a friend, since she plays the viola and enjoys Bach (she named her viola Johann Sebastion after the composer...). I might also download some more Bach to listen to, since his work really does deserve to be listened to, at least, if one enjoys instrumental pieces.

Been thinking about writing up an EVE fan-fic. I have the bulk of it in my head, I just need to put it on paper, and then move it from there into an electronical form. If I do write it up, I'll need to post it on both my Corp's forums and I'll try to post it on EVE's forums. Of course, I will post it here. I just need to figure out when to write it, and when to pry myself from the game to sit down and do it.

Speaking of games, DDR is coming to the 360! =). Of course, that's not really big news, since it was on the Xbox. Over the course of the last few weeks I've been able to put the first 50 dollars down on it, so when it comes out at the end of this month I'll be able to instantly look like I'm having an epeliptic seziure to JPop. Hopefully with the pad coming out, they'll also make the previous three games backwards compatible for the 360. Then I'll have 4 different versions of DDR to play on my 360.

There might be another thief at where I work. Well, maybe not exactly where I work, since she works in the Subway. There have been some oddities in the way she rings up customers, and this is a red flag because no reciept gets printed, which means that she's not putting the purchases in the system. Which means that she could be pocketing the money a customer gives her, and the system wouldn't catch it. What we do catch is that her drawer is suspiciously over. And that's bad.

Anyway, I need to get ready for work. I'm working at least 36 hours this week, probably closer to 40, 40+. Which means, on top of school, I'm going to be fairly tired by the end of the week. At least all of the hours worked are second shift, and not a sprinkling of third shift. Anyway, ~night

EVE addiction

2007-02-04T23:25:00.000-05:00

Gah, been addicted to EvE-Online, and it's not that the game is that fun. CoH is actually higher in the fun-nes factor than EvE is. It's that EvE is higher in the satsifaction area than CoH. Maybe it's because it's one giant player controled economy, but everything I do in the game (mining and building wise anyways) feels like I'm doing something usefull, and the way the skills and levels work in that game give me a greater sense of achievment than what CoH gave me. Or maybe it's that the corp I'm in is more active than the Supergroup I left in CoH, or maybe it's because there are more things people can do in EVE thn just hunt and missions. I don't know, but I feel I'm more addicted to EVE than I ever was to CoH. It might also be that one of my favorite games of all time was (I'll use a Wikipedia link to satisfy those with a wiki addiction =P.) Escape Velocity Nova.

Still been fairly depressed over the last couple of days =(, and I don't actually know why. I'm fairly happy when I'm around others, but when I'm alone... well, that's when it's at its worse. Actually, it's gotten to the point where the only song I whistle at work is the themesong of MASH, and yes, I do know the lyrics. Add to that the fact that I've been listening a little too much to Sinergy's most recent albumn, and well...

Speaking of music, I finally used my Christmass gift certificate to itunes to pick up two classical music CDs. I picked up Holst's: The Planets performed by the London Symphany, and I picked up the albumn that O'Fortuna is on (it includes other poems and songs from the same illuminated manuscript it came from), performed by the Boston Symphany. I personally like the Planets better myself =), with my favorite movement from it probably being Jupiter. Mars is ok, but a little too oppressive for my tastes.

Anyway, I need to call it a night, I still have some Chemistry work to do by tomorrow at noon =(.

Last post of January 07

2007-01-30T18:56:00.000-05:00

You know, I've realized something... my titles are getting less innovative as the days go on. I'm going to need to try to fix that in the near future.

Not much new has happened in the terms of events. I'm still working a combination of day and night shifts, along with taking morning classes. As such, I am really tired. And I'm starting to think (err.... been thinking it really since high school), that the more tired I get (ie, when I go 24+ hours with out sleep, then only get 4 hours of sleep for the next day) the more depressed I get, and the more my thoughts linger upon things that make me... unhappy. Not going to go into more details than that, at least not on my blog. Of course, I could also tribute the depression to the betrayel of trust from those employees in the previous post, or to how it's the middle of winter, or to how Valentines Day is coming up and I'll be alone for it (20th time =(.), or a thousand other things. But ya... I'm feeling much better now than I was this time last week.

Got to see Spamalot on Sunday with my family. Pretty funny show, though they took out my favorite part of the Monty Python and the Holy Grail, which was the witch trial. Still, they made up for it in other, more humerous ways. But a few songs and jokes in the musical are visual specific, while others reference other Monty Python Jokes. For example, one of the songs they sung in it was the ending song of Life of Brian, which I just broke into laughter that they used it. Anyway, it was a good show.

Finished reading A Clockwork Orange. It was OK, and I can see why it was considered a classic, but I'm not to big a fan of crime and such things. Still, his writing style is unique, and his concept of making a crimal be able to perform good "like clockwork" is interesting.

Anyway, I'm going to call it a night. Night!

Edit: I'm looking foreward to a certain blog getting an update =P.

Crime and Punishment

2007-01-23T12:05:00.000-05:00

First off, I've been spending way too much time playing EVE. Since I've started, I've probably been spending 25-35 hours a week on it, which is about 10 hours more a week then I ussually spend gaming. On the down side, it's kind of hurt the amount of sleep I get, but on the plus side I'm saving money in the gas I'm not using to drive to places.

As to the review of the game, the best way to describe it is as the anti-CoH. Where CoH is mission driven, has a rigidly defined class and leveling structure, and no economy to speak of, EVE is economicly driven, has an open to all skill system, and its economy can best be described as capatalistic. There are missions in the game, but rather than tell an interesting and immeservie story, they're there to help one gain standing with NPC corporations and Factions. The crafting system is different, and not only are there skills to improve one's ability to craft, one can also invest time and money to improve the default blue prints, which is pretty nice. The skills in the game, as I said earlier, are open to anyone. When you start the game, you choose some basic skills and attributes. You then can improve those skills, and buy new ones. Skills improve based upon time, litterary. You choose a skill to train, click train skill, and it will begin training to the next level. The speed at which it trains is determined not by how often you perform the action, but by your learning skill ranks. Of course, regardless, it can take a long time to learn some skills (Training Industry to level 5 taks about 10 days with decent learning skill ranks.) Luckily, you can train your skills with out actually being logged in, just set one before you log out.

Now that the (poorly done) EVE review is handled, on to more pressing things about life. I spent 30 hours at the gas station over the weekend, and the reason for that is that we fired 2 of the 3 people who worked night shift for theft. What they stole was lottery tickets to feed their gambling habbits. I don't think it was for the money, but I could be wrong. I know that one of the two had a major gambling problem, and because of this incident we are now sending home any employee caught playing the lottery while on the clock. I thought they were honest until they did this, and for their betrayal, I hope they rot in Hell for it. It's not just the money that it makes it bad, it's their deseption, and their apparent apathy towards the fact that they're doing this to their benefactor, and I feel horrible that this happened.

School is going ok, though I'm going to need to find a text book for my chem class. I'm actually not all there in terms of school this semester. I'm fairly lethergic this semester, and I've already missed my European History course twice this semester. That's kind of bad, considering that the semester started less than a month ago. It's that my job and all my other classes are night, or close to it, while this class is morning. I'm (currently) on good terms with the teacher, so I'll talk to him about it, maybe get some suggestions on what to do. Ya, I know, going to sleep before midnight might help, but I normally don't get home until midnight, which can make going to sleep before then either impossible, or dangerous (sleeping on the road is not a good idea).

I have about a thousand other things I'd like to post today, including the fact that I'm upset that I can't seem post more than once a week at best =(, but all those things are going to have to wait till a day I don't need to get ready for my dead end conscripted job. So ~night!

Viva 07

2007-01-07T22:48:00.000-05:00

First off, I need to welcome in the new year! Happy 07 everyone, and although it still feels like just another day has passed, somehow we need to feel special that the calendar companies are making money again.

Well, school has started up again, and I kind of want to go, kind of don't. I am happy that I somehow made my classes such that 3 days a week I can sleep in till 11, while the other 2 I need to wake up at 8. Weekends don't count when messuring sleep in time =P. I'm also happy that I'll be going back to an accademic setting. It's just that... I don't know, it might just be that I've spent too much time there. This should be my last semester there, than I'll go on to a university, hopefully UCF.

I've temporarily suspeneded my CoH account. I've played it for about 20 months, and I kind of feel I need a change. I will miss it, and I do plan on being back to that game. Instead, I'm trying out EVE-Online. So far it has a few things I like, and a few things I dislike. I'll write a review on it in my next blog.

Also, as the title implies, I've picked up Viva Pinata! Very fun, cute game for the 360 =).

Last post of 06

2006-12-31T11:59:00.000-05:00

Well, sorry for the lack of posts. I've been kind of busy with friends, Holiday related stuff, and work.

I spent last night painting Warhemmer 40K minatures with Will, and it's been a while since I've last held a paint brush. The minatures we painted where his space marines, and he was hesitant to lend me a brush, since he still remembers my pastel colored Tyranids. Still, I painted by his color scheme, and improved one or two techniques he used. Unfortunately, now I want to get back into painting minautres. Stupid expensive paint.

I probably won't get another chance to do anything with him, since he leaves Tuesday morning and I work both Monday and Tuesday. There were talks about doing something tonight, but.... last night was a good enough ending to his time here. After the mini painting, we even got a few rounds of Halo in. At least I'll be able to see him on CoH after he leaves.

Christmass came and went, and my family exchanged gifts. Actually, I still need to get some of my friends christmass gifts, and I kind of feel bad that I haven't been able to get them anything yet (stupid poor paying job). I already know what I want to get them, it's just the empty bank account that's preventing me. Granted, there's only two friends left for me to get gifts for, and granted that one of them hasn't gotten me anything yet, but I still feel bad.

As to what I got, well, I recieved a few movies, and one or two gift cards. One of the gift cards I'm going to put toward a copy of Viva Pinata. The other one I used on picking up some sleep wear (Do you know how hard it is to find shorts and a matching cami in the middle of winter? Damn Florida waether's tempature).

Anyway, It's almost midnight, so I'm going to call it a night. Night!

Well, He's down

2006-12-20T18:50:00.000-05:00

Well, I spent some of the last few days with Will, partly since I wanted to let him borrow a few games and books to keep him occupied. I let him borrow my copy of Dead Rising and my copy of DoA 4, along with the new Halo novel and the third book of the Horus Heresy.

When I let him play Dead Rising, I became disturbed. He had this hideous, evil, gleeful laugh everytime I showed him a new weapon in the game, with the most horrific laughs coming from his discovery of the lawn mower, and his discover of the battle axe. I never want to hear a person laugh like that again, and I'll make a suggestion to his family to never leave him unsupervised with power tools again =P.

I have all the Christmass gifts purchased for my family, and next ppaycheck (I know it won't be until after Christmass) I'll purchase the gifts for my friends. I have a good idea on what to get everyone, so that should be easy enough. I got one of my sisters three classic books that I know she hasn't read yet, the other I got a wireless mouse for her labtop. I got my mom a few things from Bath and Body Works, and my Dad is going to recieve a copy of Poor Richard's Almanac. As to my friends, well, I only have a few ideas right now.

I spent Monday, my day off, at the station pressure washing both the carwash and the dumpster area. I never want to do that again. The amount of dirt that I got off the carwash floor was.... too much. And never enter into a carwash with one of those magnetic clip on thingies on your vehicle. I cleaned so many of those things out of there...

Anyway, I have to go to work soon =(, night... err morning!

Finals are Over =)

2006-12-16T19:24:00.000-05:00

Well, first some update news stuff. I added a new christmass flash to my yahoo groups flash holder. It's not much, but it is a flash animation. And yes, I know Christmass ends in only one S.

The other news stuff/update thing involves a blog that was left in my comments section. If you missed the comment he left, you can still get access to his site here. And ya, I know his user pic is kind of... diffrent...

Well, finals and papers are over and done. I only had to take two finals, and I hope I did well on them. As to the papers, I ended up having to turn in the one on Goethe's Faust a day late. Lost a high number of points for turning it in late, but since my grade in that class was a high A, it shouldn't affect it too much. I had to turn it in late because I didn't realize the play was approximately 300 pages, and thus it took a little bit longer to write up then previously expected. I did skim it, at least Part 1, and I still have the book for when I want to read it (it is worth reading, and I think I'd also like to read Marlowe's version).

I currently have a stack of books I want to read, but due to distractions, probably won't get to =(. These include my copy of Livy's History of Rome first four volumes, Plutarch's Fall of the Roman Republic, a shadowrun book I have on my nightstand, and two Dune books. I'd add to that Milton's Paradise lost, but it's just too dry for me to read. At least Livy keeps things entertaining.

Will will be getting down sometime this week, though he won't be able to do anything till the 21st. Part of me is happy that he is coming home for Christmass, another part of me is... I guess aprehensive. I don't really know why, I mean, I've known him since my first year of High School (and as such, it makes him my longest running friend), but... I don't know. In the very least I can probably con him into helping me beat General RAAM on Hardcore in Gears of War.

Well, according to my community college's list of graduating students, I have recieved my AA degree this semester. Of course, that's not finalized till Febuary, and a whole host of things could potentially ruin my standing (such as a bad grade this semester, an overdue library book, and a few other things that I can't currently think of). Still, I am at least on the list of people who might have their AA degree, so that makes me, on paper, smarter than those who don't =P. Unfortunately, I'm only smarter than them on paper. It's kind of like communism.

No, I didn't get to go to the concert last night. I drove by the bar Needlework was playing at, but their was no parking. None, and I was unsure of weather they'd let me in, since I'm not yet 21. So what Gina and I did was we spent the night at Steak and Shake (we actually got decent service for once), then afterwards we swung by my place. She spent the night playing Lummines, and I found an article on a controversial practice affecting america. If you do wish to surf more articles on that website take heed, you will loose IQ points.

Anyways, that's all I got for tonight. Since school is out I'll probably be able to update a little more often. Night!

Work Load

2006-12-09T19:56:00.000-05:00

Well, first off, let me draw attention to the somewhat new look of the site. The archive section on the right now functions easier, I've updated my profile blurb text thingy, and I added a new link to my links sidebar. The link is to gamepolitics.com, and it's where I get a lot of my video game politics information. I've been using their site for political intrique for the last 7 months, so I thought I'd finally add a link to it.

I have one of my papers typed up and turned in. It's not the one I've been talking about, but I have at least some of the work done. The other two papers I have are due on Wednessday, and I need to study for my Calc final on Monday. I actually only have 2 exams I need to take, my calculus exam and my Humanaties class. I'm some what worried about my humanaties grades, but I think I'm pulling a B in that class right now, at least I hope I am. Most of my tests have been high C's, but I do have an A and a high B test, so.... and right now my Calc grade is sitting at a C. But my History grade, and my World Lit grade is currently an A.

Been working a lot over the weekend. I worked 13.5 hours yesterday/this morning, along with another 1.5 today (my day off...). My last check, which was for thanksgiving, was a pretty big check, but since I had a few bills to pay, a christmass gift to pick up, and a new volume of Ahh, my goddess, found its way into my anime library, well, I'm where I'm normally am.

Been getting into some Gothic rock/electonica recently for music. Been listening largely to Cruxshadows and Dreamside. Though I have been listening to some new types of death metal/black metal. A friend burned me a copy of Chimera's The impossibility of reason, and I'm anxiously awaiting Black Rose Burial's first albumn. I heard one of their Demo tapes. They have the random, pointless things of System of a Down, but their good, so... at least, some of their stuff is.

Anyway, I have to be back at work tomorrow at 2, so I'm going to call it a night. Night!

Stupid migraine

2006-11-30T23:38:00.000-05:00

Thursday saw an eight hour migraine. It was the first one of those I've had in a few years, and I'm not to fond of them. Light, sound, and movement all caused pain. Hopefully it won't be for another few years till I get my next one.

Don't know if I've mentioned this yet, but Will's back in the states. He arrived saftely about a week or two ago, which makes me feel a little better. He somehow got my cell phone number, and called me up a few days ago for tech support on his PC. Considering I had no idea how is PC was set up... kind of weird.

I'm almost finished with one of my papers. I have most of the research done, so all I need to do is organize it, then write it. The writing is the easiest part, and the research tends to be the harder. After I get this one finished, then it'll be on to the next two.

Sorry, I've been writing this entry in bits and pieces. I started it a few days ago (thursday), and have basically written one paragraph each day. Don't know why I'm taking so long on this one, but I am...

Anyway, can't think of too much else to post, so I'm going to call it quits right now. Night!

More Gas Station fun

2006-11-24T23:15:00.000-05:00

I ended up working on Thanksgiving, from 2 to 10 (pm). I know I could use the extra hours, and I did volunteer for it, so it wasn't that bad. And I knew what my family plans were for that day. They weren't going to have a tradtional thanksgiving dinner, instead they hit up a place in Tampa (about 40 miles north)and spent the day up there, and I really didn't wish to do that. On the other hand, I really did want to spend the day with them, and I was kind of saddened that I spent my first thanksgiving totaly uninvolved with my family (until around 11 pm). Besides, work was very slow yesterday, so it wasn't too enjoyable.

The gas station fun isn't about what happened on Thanksgiving though (well, kind of anyways). Apparently the people in Dairy Queen don't know that the emergency silent alarm button they have, shouldn't be accidently pressed (they pressed it yesterday and today), and the station gets charged a large sum everytime it is accidently pressed. And this is the third time it's been accidently pressed, and all three times were in Dairy Queen. Now, they claim they've been leaning against the counter, and that's how it is getting pressed. The person who pressed it today, and the one who pressed it yesterday, will get billed for the pressing. Hopefully that will stop it, though I think if you were to give either myself or my sisters a few minutes with them, my daggers I got at the Medieval fair last Saturday, and turn the cammeras off, there would be a lot less bad things happening in our Dairy Queen, and a lot more employee satisfaction. Plus, head count would trend down. OK, maybe that's a little too far, but still, I'm unhappy at their actions. Espically since I had to do the paper work for the last two incidents.

Picked up Small Arms from the 360's arcade. It's cheap, and it's fun. It's like Smash Brothers for the Game Cube/64, except the characters have some what messed up bios. And that it has live support.

I'm going to have to take my truck in to have it looked at. Apparntly either the battery is faulty, or there is some bad wiring, since I needed to get it jumped when I left the station tonight. The vehicle has a total of 4580 miles on it, so it should be under warranty. Still...

Two good things happened today. The first (and most important good thing) is that I found out there are still people (or maybe just singular) who read this. That, for some unfathumable reason made me happy. The other is that my copy of Ben Franklin's The Poor Richard's Almanac finally arrived, so I got to wear my fox tail at a crowed mall on Black Friday to pick it up at the book store (I might like a little attention now and then.) I've already read through it twice, and I hope to take heart at least some of the wisdom in it. The book itself contains about 5 years of his wisdom, and if you don't know what I'm babling about, you can find out here.

Anyway, it's night time, so I'm off to sleep.

Back in Color

2006-11-21T00:03:00.000-05:00

Well, that was an eventfull week, espicially for one not having internet access =(. I dislike that it took a week (Saturday) for them to send a person out to our home. And the major problem was that the ourside box, a box I didn't even know existed, got resetted in one of our common power outages. If I knew that box existed, I probably could have resetted it on my own.

My last day at Wyman, Green, & Blalock was Thursday, and it was one of those days that fit the mood. The sky was downcast and the wind was chilled as it bit into your bones. Everyone there was sorry to see me go. I guess in my time there, they kind of grew attached to me. As any reader of this blog knows, it's not that I partically enjoyed the work there, though I enjoyed it far more than I enjoy the stuff at my current job, it was more the office enviorment that I kind of liked. I had my own, semi-private space (yay! Cubicle) which I could decorate as long as it was work apporiate. My job title also sounded important, and every few months I got to work on a different, exciting project. Despite how repetitive I make IT sound (some of it is), there are a lot of misc, once a year, kind of jobs in that department that keep it somewhat interesting, and it will be not only the private, decorative space I'll miss, but those misc projects and the awe that holding the IT title holds. Well, maybe not too much the awe part. Since everyone ends up asking you to look at their computers if you're in IT, it might be better I no longer hold the title.

As to my current job, well, there's still a lot of just... useless crap in it. Employees who we thought were trustworthy steeling money, others huffing the aresole out of the wip cream cans, and still other things occuring. On top of all that, I get to hear it when I'm at home with family, since it is a family buisness. I don't like being there, and I like it even less when I have to discuss all the crap in it during my off hours. Hope I can get into UCF in Orlando so I can leave this job behind.

There are two major reasons why I want to go to UCF. The first is to get away from home and the family buisness, and the second is for the engineering degree I kind of want. I don't really know if I want to write code for the rest of my life, but it is something I'm good at, so I might as well try to study it, and hopefully get a job in it. As to the leaving home thing, I know I have it pretty nice at home right now, I know that. But still, the urge to leave, the urge to get my own place, the urge to do all that is strong, and has been since Highschool. Though I will desperatly miss having family to talk to when I'm alone at home, at least, non work related conversations.

School is going ok, though in about 3 weeks I have three 10 page research papers due. One is on the evolution of government from the dawn of time to 1000AD, one is on the works of Johhen Van Gothe, and the last one is on Illuminated Manuscripts of the Medieval ages. Right now, all I can feel towards school is apathy, probably due to me switching jobs and deeling with some of the stuff at the other job. Still, I need to get to work on those papers, definatly during the holiday weekend. But isn't that what college teaches you, though? How to write an excellent paper in one night?

While backing up my truck on Saturday night, I kind of backed into another vehicle. It's just a dent in the person's side rear panel, but it's probably going to be expensive to fix. I'm probably going to borrow money from my parents to pay that off =(, since I doubt it even meets the minimum on the insurance deductable. As to why I didn't see the vehicle behind me when I was backing out, well, remember how I complained about how high and big the truck was? Ya... the car was about a foot shorter than my tailgate, and about as long as my vehicle was wide. Hard to see it when your vehicle blocks it.

Also, one of my friends has decided to stop working at Win-Dixie. He's been working there for about a year and a half (about as long as I worked at my insurance company), and has decided that it might be better to take a lower paying job if there's a lower level of stress to it. I've been trying to tell him to do that for the last 4 months, but he doesn't choose to listen to me. Yet when he finally comes to that conclusion... He needs a job change though, though hopefully it'll be one with a low level of customer interaction. He's a good, nice person but he just not too customer oriented. Any place that hires him should consider themselves lucky to get him.

Will's back in the states!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! He's not in Florida =(, but at least he's safe home again. I actually talked to him on his cell phone today. We had a nice, long conversation about, well, geek culture and how his trip home went, and how he's liking everything. I'm just happy that he's safe.

Gears of War is now playing on my 360. The single player game is decent, but the multiplayer player game is pretty well made. The gameplay itself on multiplayer is better than Halo 2's, but the way they do matchmaking, and that it logs you out to the main screen after each match (they normally last about 30 minutes) really gets on my nerves. Still, it's a fun game.

Anyway, I need sleep because of work tomorrow. Night!

Verizon is evil

2006-11-14T21:05:00.000-05:00

OK, sorry for the late, and short post. I'm typing this up in my work's office (Gas station, not Wyman Green), to write that my home internet connection will not be able to be restored until at least Saturday, which will mean that I won't have internet connection at home for at least a full week (lost conection four days ago.) Gah! And there was so much time wasting that I need to do online. At least i have this office computer on some of the days I work.

I'm addicted to the net, so expect withdraw symptoms to start anytime.

Ghosts of Onyx

2006-11-05T00:08:00.000-05:00

Well, as the name of this post and color implies, I've picked up and read the new halo book Ghosts of Onyx. The guy who writes it is decent, not as good as the people who wrote the books in the Horus Heresy, but still decent. He'll go down for writing the Halo Novels, but I don't know if his works will otherwise be able to stand by themselves. Still, it entertained for an afternoon.

As you can probably guess, I've finished reading the three books in the Horus Heresy. The next one is coming in March, so I have to find something to do till then. Too bad authors can't write at the speed a reader reads. Still, the books are better than the standard dime store novels most authors produce (me included, though even I don't remember what I've written.)

It's kind of odd, but come Monday I'll be putting in my Two Weeks notice at Wyman, Green, & Blalock. There's a lot of reasons for this, the primary one is because my parents need me to fill a shift hole they can not fix =(. But that's not the only thing, there's the decline of hours, and the fact that Wyman, Green & Blalock will be merging with BB&T banking/insurance (err make that bought by BB&T). A part of me doesn't want to leave the place. Despite the fact that I enjoy whining and complaining about my job there, it is one of the more enjoyable jobs I've had. And I was a specialist, which means people respected my profession. Saying you worked in IT made people think you knew something, and that image of me is going to go now. Sure, I can say I'm studying to be an engineer, but there is a difference between being a student and being employed in that profession. Furthermore, I'm going to miss the people there. There are a lot of good people who work in that company, a lot of good coworkers, and I can't say that about the gas station.

And now, a new point for me to whine about, the station. First off, I don't like working there, and that dislike is compounded by the fact that I'm basicly forced to work there. Though I would feel guilt if I didn't work there when the rest of my family does. One of the things that really annoys me about it, though, is that the station is now the only thing my family talks about. I already work there, and I'm quiting my higher paying and more enjoyable job to work there more. I spend way too much time working there, I don't want to spend even more time discussing something that just.... irks me. Ya, it's bitchy time for me. The coworkers are decent, not the best people in the world, but decent people. Still, there's a reason why they're working in fast food or a convience store at their ages. I just hope it's that life has delt them a bad hand.

Getting off the topic of work =(, I got to go to a halloween party on, well, Halloween. It was pretty enjoyable, got to meet some intresting people, maybe even one or two cute people. My costume was Catholic guise, though, and since everyone there were wiccans, well, I recieved some rather colorfull jokes about the costume. Still, I had a good time and I'll probably start hanging out with those people more often now that I've actually met them.

Anyway, although it's been forever and a day since I last posted, I think I'll call it quits for tonight. ~night!

Oh Noes, the Haxxors have stolen the Internets

2006-10-22T22:58:00.000-04:00

I had no home internet access between Tuesday and Friday. Apparntly there was some sort of issue with our home router and the way verizon's DSL was leasing our IP address. At the end of the lease, it seemed to lease it to an individual computer, and not to our router. Anyway, as you can see, the problem was fixed, with out having to call up Verizon tech support, I might add =P. As to why I didn't post last night, well, that can be best explained by combining Oblivian, misc. work stuff, Lumines Live's release on the 360, and the book Horus Rising.

Speaking of the Lumines Live game, I have mixed feelings about it. I'm happy that it's on the 360, in fact, the reason why I got a PSP was for that. I love the game. But there is the other view of the game. The whole 'episodic' crap to it. For example, the vs CPU 'episode' won't be coming out till 07. I don't mind buying the add on, for the game itself only costs 15 dollars, and you get a single player challenge mode, a skin editor mode, vs local, and vs live. I paid 23 dollars for my copy of Lumines on the PSP, and that was after it was discontinued. So 15 + episodic content doesn't really bother me. What does is that it's not there! I loved VS CPU, and I want to try out these 'mission' packs, but... gah! It's like some sort of Arcade Void that defies all logic. Microsoft probly has it on some disc somewhere in their infernal server room, laughing at us because we don't have access to it. But that's enough rambling on Lumines.

No, no story yet. I've determined that if I'm going to be serious in writing, that I'd probably have to give up, or at least seriously mitigate my inolvement in, gaming. I love both of those things, though. Yet I'm far more addicted to gaming than I am to writing. Who ever says gaming is not addictive is a filthy lair, yet out of all the harmful stuff to be addictived to, I'd view gaming as the most harmless one. Still, at least I have my blog to write in. That's something, right?

As to work, well, I'm debating on leaving WGB to work for my parents full time. I would need to talk with both them and the store's manager/co-owner about it. Yet I don't know if I want to do it though. It's just that I know I'm not going to learn too much more from WGB, and that's because of a mixture of lack of opportunities, and because I'm starting to feel that my manager wants to keep IT in demand by prohibiting knowledege of the subject to others. That would include me, to a certain extent. Of course, this could just be paranoia speaking, but still. There are a few other things about him that I find unsetteling, too, but I won't mention them here in my blog. For now, anyways.

Music wise, I've started listening to a new band called Cruxshadows. They're not metal. They're a gothish technoish type of band. I'm normally not too big into Techno, and I'm even less into making a 100 different versions of the same song fgor CD sales, but their lyrics are pretty cool.

I'm sure I've kept you up long enough reading all of this, so I'm going to call it a night. ~Night

Northwind

2006-10-12T14:15:00.000-04:00

The first albumn that I have been waiting for anxiously has finally released. It's Falconer's Northwind. The reason why I really wanted this albumn was because it uses their orginal vocalist, which is the whole reason why I picked up their first and second albumns. Overall, it is worth the wait. Gamma Ray is coming out with a new albumn next year, but considering their last two new albumns, I'm a little leary.

Work has not been too good. For the past two weeks I've only gotten 3 hours each week. According to my manager, not much new setup has been needed, and not too many errors have occured. He's been bumped down to part time, so it's not looking too good. At least the job at the station gives me enough hours to pay my bills. Although I don't particullary enjoy working there, money is money. And when you need it, you don't complain about it's source. At least, not to too many people =P.

Will apparently doesn't have a girlfriend. Apparently he told that in order to sound impressive or something. Anyway, his parents ended up finding out about his "girlfriend" (I might have mentioned something to his sister...), and got somewhat angry at me because he had to explain to his parents on the phone why they don't need to change their winter plans. I feel he deserves it. But that just may be a vindictive quality in me.

I'm going to Orlando over the weekend with my family to see the Halloscream thing. It'll be good family time, but I do wish I could be working on Friday instead of traveling.

Anyway, Oblivian is calling, and like a Kajit Skooma Addict I must return to its embrace.

Oblivian

2006-10-11T23:37:00.000-04:00

So little time, so much to do in Oblivian. I think I'm officially addicted to that game with the number of hours I spent last week on it. It's also why I have this late post. It's just, it's a good escape from life. Unfortunately, it's not as good as sleep.

Outside of oblivian, I'm also working on another short story. I'll post it here when I finish it. As with most of the drek I write, it's going to be horror. I have the begining, and a good viewpoint on the ending, but I really need to get the middle done. Hopefully I can do that soon.

I might take my 360 offline for a few days, I've spent waaaay too much time on it. If I don't have to work tomorrow morning, I'll post again then, since I have a lot to just vent. That's all I do on this blog, but...

It's Staph, not Staff

2006-10-03T00:15:00.000-04:00

Well, you know those things I get on my arms and legs occasionally? Those weird, painfull sores? Well, my family dragged me (almost kicking and screaming) to a doctor on Saturday since I have another on my right hand (hurts to write with a pencil), and it has been diagonesed as a Staph infection =(. Apparently I've had it since the first one, and these things are it's number one symptom. That means I've had it for about a year and a half. So now I'm on 2 antibiotics. And I really dislike taking medicine.

School is going ok. Though I need to devote more time to Calc 3. I did a 79 on the last test, and I feel I need to get a B in the class. I hope to spend tomorrow night studying the course material for the test on next Monday. And maybe some of Saturday.

Anyway, I know it's a short post, but I can't think of too much else I should add right now. Except maybe that I work either too many hours or not enough. Anyway, night!

Long Hours

2006-09-27T00:01:00.000-04:00

I have decided that I am starting to despise the station job. I worked about 30 hours there over the weekend, with a Friday/Saturday shift lasting 18 long, tiring hours. My shift started on Friday at 2pm, then, because both 3rd shift people didn't show up (one called in, the other just didn't show), I decided to let my manager go home and work the shift. Then, only one person showed up for the 6am shift, so I had to help her set up that morning. It was long, wearisome hours, and I don't know if I've gotten back the sleep I've lost yet.

Well, I've been sending emails back and forth to Will, and it appears that he now has a military girlfriend =(. On the one hand I'm happy for him that he's finally found someone. On the other hand... well, I'm not so happy. And maybe even a little jealous. I'm normally not too bad in the jealousy department, but... Anyway, he says he's going to bring her down the next time he's able to be in the states, so when he does I'll be able to meet her.

I've been thinking about getting back into minature painting. I use to enjoy spending long hours with brush in hand painting little pieces of metal. Not so much that it had a use, but because I found it to be one of the most relaxing things I could do. Moving the brush against the pewter, getting the colors just right, ect. If I ever get a digital camera, I'll post some of my previous miniture paint jobs online. They aren't that good, but I'm still proud of them. One of the few things I'm proud of.

Anyway, I'll post again, hopefully sooner than this one was posted (I know, I always say that). Night!

Kamelot does a cool concert

2006-09-18T23:38:00.000-04:00

First off, I'd like to say that the Kamelot concert was awesome. They threw an excellent concert on Saturday, and the bands that opened for them (Cypric Vision, Ben Jackson Group, and Crimson Glory) were fantastic. I also learend that, with the exception of the Keyboardist and the Vocalist, that the band was from Tampa, which was kind of cool. They don't play as well as dragonforce, but they throw a much better concert, and they also have respect for their fans.

Been working a lot. Also been going to school a lot. And I've been spending a lot of my free time playing dead rising. I've almost gotten through the story of that game, and well, wow. Very few games have been able to keep my attention for as long as this has. Maybe it's the random funness of it. Maybe it's the 360. Maybe it's the sick, twisted humor. Or maybe I'm just a twisted person who enjoys scenes of mass carnage and bloodshed. But what ever it is, my friends no longer trust me near nerf guns and stuffed animals. Also, they have had enough of me yelling the word Zombie!.

Recieved my tax refund check today. Half of it is going into my saving account, the other half is going to pay off the credit card I put the 360 on. I might change those figures around and pick up Dead or Alive 4 though. Since I picked up a second controller to play Halo with a friend (she's about as good as I am at the game, though I tend to do better at long range), and found out just where Microsoft makes back their money that they lose on the consoles. As such, I want a good, solid multiplayer game to make use of the overly expensive controller that I picked up. If anyone has any suggestions, feel free to post. And no, the PS3 is not a sugestion. Though I am happy that they are releasing Assasin's Creed for the 360 =p.

Anyway, I'm going to log now, night!

Still tired

2006-09-11T23:58:00.000-04:00

Ya, I'm still tired. But it's not just a physical or mental tirdness. It's one that has its roots in my core. The 360 has prevented the worse of it, something about being able to get negative emotions out on zombies, but I did relapse into a bad habbit I had in highschool about 2 weeks ago. Right when the station opened up and I was feeling overwhelmed. Still, I haven't repeated it, so that's good.

As to dead rising, just a word of caution before you decide to go pick it up. If you don't have a HD television, you will not be able to read the text on the screen. At least incoming call and item description text. Furthermore, Capcom, in their arrogance, has stated no patch for it. The game's fun though, just not worth the 59 if you don't have a HD.

I'll try to post tomorrow night if I can. I don't have anything scheduled except for some studying of Calc 3, so I should be well set. Also, the concert is this Saturday! Can't wait!

Sooo tired... =(

2006-09-09T01:08:00.000-04:00

So tired. Since my last post I've been averaging about 4 hours of sleep each night, due to multiple reasons. The first being the station opening up, follwed by school. Of course, there are other, non-needed reasons.

I know I shouldn't have, but I took a step into the world of next gen and picked up a 360, along with the games Chromehounds and Dead Rising. I would have picked up Kameo instead of Dead Rising, but I hear it's only 10 hours long, and an infinite number of zombies needing slaying sounds like more strech to my dollar. Although I'm not a big fan of giant battling robots (I belive something with that many weakpoints have no place on a battlefield), the squad based combat looks fun. Besides, when Will was down he had a copy of it, and I kind of fell enanmored with it sense then.

I am really, really, really tired, and I have work at the station to do tomorrow. More like transpoting trash in my truck to the dump (I no longer need to worry about repairs for a while).I hope to post more tomorrow, since a lot more has happened in the two? weeks since then. nifght!

Good faith and credit

2006-08-27T23:55:00.000-04:00

Ha, only 5 days since my last post. Hopefully I'll be able to get it down to 4 days inbetween each post instead of 7. Then maybe two days between posts.

I do post because it helps calm me release some emotional stuff, at least, when the posts cover things that make my life hectic. I don't post as often as I would like either because of how busy my schedule can get, or due to lazyness. Still, all things considered, this is the longest time running that I've kept a journal/dirary of my life. The second longest one was about a month. So I guess I'm doing something right. Hopefully it's enjoyable to read, and not a chore.

I applied for my first credit card today. The intrest on it is a little steep though. It's 19.5%. Which means that for every 100 dollars I have remaining balance, I'll have to pay 20 dollars in intrest. Unless I am late or over draw twice in 6 months, which would double the intrest rate for I belive 3 months. I wish I could figure out a way to do such a mark up on goods. I mean, think about it. If one pays 30 dollars off on a 100 dollar object, it lowers the bill down to 70 dollars. Then the interest bumps it up to 84 dollars (20% of 70 is 14). Another 30 dollars on the next payment lowers it down to 54 dollars, and when interest hits it'll be raised to 64.80 (10.80 interest). Another 30 dollars lowers it to 34.80. After interest it'll be 41.76 (6.96 in interest.) Another 30 dollars would lower it to 11.76. Interest comes and raises it to 14.12 (2.36 intrest.) Then the final payment of 14.12. Which brings the final price of the prchase to 134.12. With 34.12 being interest. Which is more than a 33% markup. Being able to make anywhere from 33%+ on a buisness model, with out actually having to have inventory, is just... it should be illegale! Following a similar method with, say, a 3000 dollar purchase, the bank would make 1000 dollars in interest. If I ever get the money to do something like this, I'll start my own credit card company and reap the benifits of it.

My parents' buisness (the gas station), will be opening on Tuesday. As such, my sisters and I have been hecticly preparing the place for it, along with a bunch of employees. It's not too bad, except that my mother is worrying waaaay too much over everything, and as such, is trying to micromanage every detail in the place. And she really shouldn't. I still don't want to work there, but with the way things have been at WGB, I really could use the extra money (about 14-20 extra hours each week). That would prevent me from getting another 200 dollar paycheck to last two weeks (180 of which went to vehicle maintence, and 15 of which went to CoX).

Speaking of CoX, I kind of ment to do this announcement about, say, 2 months ago, but haven't got around to it. About two months ago, my global friend's list got deleted. So if you were on my global friend's list, and wondering why I don't recognize your alt's name, that would be the reason. To compound matters, it's only on my end that I don't see your name. To fix it, you'd have to remove me from your friends list, then send an invite. Anything else produces an error =(. So I apologize again about that.

Also, I'm thinking of getting into Eve Online, though I'd probably have to drop CoX to do it. I really don't want to drop CoX, for although I only play it about once a week (3 to 4 hours each week), I still have friends on it. Friends who I enjoy seeing for those 4 hours. I also enjoy the character custamization, something I don't think Eve has. Still, if it's anything like Escape Velocity Nova, it might be worth it.

Anyway, I need to get up early tomorrow morning to type up a paper (no printer at home), so night!

Stupid 8 Days

2006-08-22T22:07:00.000-04:00

Sorry for the lack of posts durring the past eight days. I ment to only have six days between posts, but a few stress full envents have occured.

The most stress full event was that, according to the emails he sent me, Will was on a three day suicide watch. When he told me he got of it, he didn't email me for three days afterwards, which really made me nervous. But it sounds like he's doing better now. At least I hope he is. Still, I do feel bad that there's very little I can do here to help him over there. Though I should be sending him a packet of stuff soon. I just hope he doesn't do anything stupid.

Work has become even more tedious. Our scanner girl is going to temporary fill in for our account assistant while she's on her two week vacation, so guess who gets to spend her next two weeks as a file clerk, pointlessly filing away useless documents everyday? That's right, me! With the exception of Friday, I have not done anything IT related in about a month. Which is really naking me think about leaving the company. I mean, I like the people there, I do, and I think they like me as a person, but the work I'm currently doing can best be described as busy work. Like going in and making sure that some policies are scheduled to be rewritten. Or the filing. I really despise filing. A lot. But work's work, and until I get something else lined up, this is what I have to deal with. Not that there is any place close that's hiring. Well, I could always go back to the grocery buisness, but the only place where I'd have job security in the area is the newly opened Walmart, and I don't want to be working for minimum wage. I don't know, I just wish my job made me feel useful. And that its future did not involve filing.

School started Monday. I had to reschedule my Calc class because the canceled the morning one, so now I'm taking Calc 3 at five instead of 10. Which means I'm going to be getting 2 less hours each week because of when I have to leave work. On top of that, I found out that my Humanaties class uses a different textbook then the one I was told to buy, so now I'm going to have to replace it =(. Still, I should do well this semester. I also sent an email to the Engineering Department at UCF asking if they have any recomendations for what I should do to get into their program.

Not all of the week was bad, though. I got to see one of the bands I like, Dragonforce, in concert at the states theater in St. Pete. The show was sold out, so I was lucky to get tickets. It was worth the 16 dollar entry fee. Although it doesn't sound too enjoyable, 750 people packed together in a small space with little AC is fun.

That's about it for right now. I'll try to update this more often since I really would do this twice a week instead of once a week. Hopefully I'll find a way to do that.

Not a doctor

2006-08-14T23:14:00.000-04:00

The MOSI muessum, about 50 minutes from my house, has been having this bodies exhibit for the past couple of months. This guy took unknown cadavers, preserved them, disected them, then put them in a muessum. My family and I went to see the exhibit, and I discovered that it's probably a good thing I'm not in school to be a doctor or a surgeon. I was really uncomfortable in the exhibit. Which is odd, since I play some of the most gruesome games on the market.

Right now I don't think my manager cares one way or the other if I'm at work or not. Everything I've done so far for the past three weeks have been things for other departments. I don't exactly know what that means, but right now I don't want to think about it.

I've been meaning to post this for the past two weeks, but a friend of mine (probably the only person who reads this blog) has created a demo project thing of code he's working on. I wasn't a big fan of it (only looked at a few things, and those seemed to be just descriptions of what he was working on), but I figured I'd post it here anyways. Please note that the project is 18+ ONLY. You can download a torrent of it here.

Other than that, and a tickle war with a friend on Thursday (I think it was Thursday), not too much has been happening. Next week will see the begining of my classes though. I'm looking foreward to them though, it'll be something to do.

Oh, and before I log, microsoft will be releasing free video game development tools for windows and the xbox360. Though to actually get it on the 360 will require a $99/year subscription. It seems to me a good idea to produce mods, user created content, and to introduce some innovation to the industry cheaply. Anyway, that's about it, so night!

Rice is yummy =)

2006-08-06T21:03:00.000-04:00

Right now, I have a giant bowl of rice and honeyed bacon (I know, sounds weird, but combined it's good). I'm happy. OK, maybe it's not a giant bowl, and maybe it'd be better with something to drink, but it's still good.

I found a working copy of Eternal Darkness, and it seems to be a cool game so far. Not too scary, but fun. When I think of a horror game, I think of something like Silent Hill, where it is better to run then fight. This game rewards fighting by refilling your sanity. So it's not what I expected, but it's different. And it's cell shaded.

I'm starting to put together another entertainment package for Will. I have some anime in it, and I'm going to add some music to it. Any suggestions on what else I should add? Though I probably won't be shipping it till sometime after the 15th (aka payday). Before he left he did say he wanted some more anime to watch.

My mother turned 43 on Friday. I got her two prayer devotional books. She liked them, at least, she liked them better than the cheese slicer she got from my grandparents. So that's good.

I also payed for my classes on Thursday, and picked up the new textbooks I need. World Lit had 4 for the class. Luckily, I was able to get my European History book cheap from a friend. My calc book is still good for calc 3, and there was only one book needed for intercultureal humanities. Hopefully that one will be like my hummanities class in Highschool, so hopefully I should get an A.

I've had some stuff to do at work, enough to give me 20 hours last week. Hopefully I can get another 20 next week, if we have enough form letters to fill out. Otherwise, well, I just want enough to do so that I don't have to pace myself. Right now my posistion is less IT and more Project Lackey. The people there like me, I think, so it's not something against me. I just hope they consider me a valuable employee.

~Night

I ment to post on Saturday

2006-07-31T17:36:00.000-04:00

Work's been slow. Very slow, which sucks since I'm payed hourly. For when you're paid hourly, and your boss has nothing for you to do... at least I've been able to catch up on some sleep.

I've started to get into IRC. Been doing some chatting on it, not that there's much else to do on it. Some of the people on it are fun, crazy indivduals, but others are creepy. And not the fun creepy. But those types of people end up making my ignored list.

I've got the labtop working reliably right now. The cost for sodering the new piece on was waaay out of my price range (95 dollars an hour, 2 hour job), so rather then doing that, I fiddled around with the interior of the machine. Now instead of always crashing, it'll continue running if the power cord is in at the right angle. Which is a step up from it dying with out notice.

Other than those things, not much has been happening. So night.

I apologize, been kind of busy

2006-07-25T09:23:00.000-04:00

I'm almost the only one in my SG on CoH who isn't romanticly involved with some one. It's kind of weird, all things considered. And I guess that means I'm kind of the geekiest person in my SG. That's one title I really don't want...

Speaking of that, some friends of mine are trying to set me up with someone. I don't really know the person too well, but I already know that we don't have much in common to talk about. I don't mean it in a bad way, but the person and I, we share similar hobbies, but they're different enough to make it so that we don't have intrest in those areas. Kind of like two computer gurus, but one is a follower of Gates and the other is a follower of mr. Jobs. Maybe that's what's wrong with that part of my life. I use computer descriptions to compare personalities. Still, I guess I'd be willing to try it.

Well, Will leaves tomorrow morning. I wish he wasn't. We really didn't do too much important stuff. Just the standard friend type of stuff. You know, just hanging out, talking, making jokes, watching a few shows, just the normal stuff most people do. He's also kind of big into Warhammer 40K, something I got him into, and I let him borrow some of my old models over the weekend to play at his favorite game store. I don't know if he actually used them, but at least he had a chance to play. I do need to get some CDs ready for him, which I'll have to ship off since I won't be able to see him again before he leaves. I have a few bands picked out, but I'll need some other things. Since I have Zim and Dilbert back, I'll probably send him my Crno Crusade and my Lain stuff. I wasn't too big of a fan of them, but maybe he'll like them.

I did get his labtop, I owe him for it, but it needs some drastic repairs. The most important would be it needs a new AC jack, and for that to be replaced, I will need to find someone in the area who does sodering work. The part itself is 6 dollars on ebay, so I'm not too worried about the cost (I'm guessing it'll be a half hour of work). The machine does work with out, but you need to hole the power plug at a certain angle. After I get that fixed I'll need to start clearing some of the crap off of it. And dear god he has a lot of crap on it. He also has some weird stuff on it. Very weird stuff. To put it in perspective, I don't think he knew Furcadia (the fact he played the game is creepy enough)left chat logs on the machine. And he really should have deleted his internet bookmarks. But ya, there's a lot of crap I'd have to get out of there.

Some friends and I are already designing our halloween costumes. I don't know what I'm going to wear yet, since it's waaay too early in the year, but it will be catgirlesq. Who knows, I might be able to get my hands on a camera and post pictures of me in costume. Maybe. Hopefully.

I got my windshield replaced finally. Not because I wanted to, but because the cop who had nothing better to do then to write me a ticket told me I had to. Luckily, insurance covered it, but I still need to pay the ticket. It should drop in price from 74.50 to some price less since I can prove I got it replaced. But still. What really gets me is that Florida is the only state in the union that has that law. Still, at least living in Florida means I don't have to pay a state income tax. But ya, part of my next paycheck is going to pay off that ticket.

As to my flash animations, they were kind of put on hold because Will was down. I'm going to resume them soon. I have two or three in the works. The Will's Life comic one, another MoonCreature one, and some simple Gradius sprite thing. If I could figure out how to recompress the music, and to only choose certain sections, then I'd also do a flash based upon this Canadian folk song. The song is The Last Saskatchewan Pirate. It's performed by a band called Captian Tractor (intresting name...), though it was orginally written by another band called Arrogant Worms. Still, everyone loves pirate flashes. And in case you're wondering on my viewpoint, pirates can beat a ninja any day of the week.

There's really not much else to talk about, well, I could complain about the lack of hours at my job but I won't, so I'll leave it at that. I shouldn't have too many distractions so my next post might actually be on time.

Well, he's Here

2006-07-15T23:06:00.000-04:00

Well, Will's down now. I spent Tuesday, Thursday Evening, and Friday Evening with him. I plan on spending some time with him tomorrow too. On Tuesday he picked up a 360. Which means that I'm going to have to save up to get one now, though I'll probably wait till a price drop. On Thursday we saw the shakesperian play As You Like It, and I enjoyed it. We saw it because his younger brother was in it. We really didn't do much on Friday. But I'm enjoying the time spent with him. If I were one to take pictures, I'd record it all in a scrap albumn. But I'm one to type long blogs about the stuff I do, so that's what I'm going to do.

Oh, we also forced him to get a new pair of glasses on Tuesday. He's been using his military glasses which, although work, are aesthetically hideous. There's something wrong when he thinks those glasses were ment to be permenant. Still, his new glasses look nice.

Work has been kind of slow, which I guess is both a good thing and a bad thing. I got Tuesday off to spend with Will (he came down Monday night, half a day later than I expected), but I recieved Wedness day off because of lack of things to do. I spent that day glued to my cell phone in the faint, delusional hope that my work might call and tell me they had some overly repetitive task that they wanted me to preform. It didn't happen though... I worked a half day on Thursday, then spent longer than normal on Friday because of a system update. The net result was about 16 hours this week, when I'm normally use to 22. But this is the second week at my new pay scale, so hopefully that'll make up for it. Otherwise, well, I guess I'll figure out a way to purchase textbooks next month.

I found an archery range today, and spent a half hour shooting off my Grandfather's bow. The bow is a 60 pound bow, which surprised the guy at the range. Apparantly beginners should only be shooting 20 pound bows. As to my accuracy, well, the most dangerous place to be is about 5 feet above, or to the left, of my target. The safest place to be is where I'm aiming. Still, for 5 dollars, I'll probably go back there next Saturday. Eight dollars would buy me an hour on the range, but I don't know if my arms and my fingers could fire off that bow for an hour.

As to where the bow is being stored when I'm not using it, well, my Dad wants it stored in the same place where he stores his rifle. His viewpoint is that, if some one where to break into our home, and find the bow, that they would use it against the family. Now, as wise as those words sound, it's kind of difficult to use a bow. More difficult than to use a firearm. Also, I think if some one where to break into our house, that they would probably be armed with something more dangerous than a bow. I didn't argue with him, though. As to where the fire arms and the bow are, well, unless you were involved in the consturction of a specific room in our home, you won't find them. Though I do agree with hiding the rifle.

I picked up the third installment of the DDR series for the Xbox today, and so far it seems pretty good. Much better than the second one, at least. I got it on sale, which was one of the biggest points of purchase.

Tomorrow, some of my friends and I plan to throw Rob a birthday party. His family is not invited. The reason being is that they have crossed one of my closest friends (his girlfriend) one too many times. They don't view her as his girlfriend, or as a potential family member. They view her as a means to punish him. And they're sadestic. Luckly, their IQ and be counted on one hand, so they often times fail in what they try to do, but everyone is sick of what they're doing, and getting back at them sounds good. What we're doing is first watching the orginal Pirates of the Carribean at my house. Then we're going to a 3ish showing of the second one (I liked it enough to see it twice, no one else has seen it, though), and finally we're going to dinner, probably at RJ Gators (a Chili's kind of resturant). It should be fun.

I've started the fourth Dune novel, God Emprorer of Dune. So far it's good, but I'm only on page 50 something.

Finally, I might be able to get a laptop for 50 dollars. It'd need a replacement battery, but other than that it should be good. If the Windows Disk and the Drivers disk is in good condition, and the only problem with it is the battery, and the specs are decent, than I'll pick it up. I'm hoping those conditions are true.

Anyway, that's all I have to type tonight (not tired for once! Yay!!)~Night!!

A Long Delay

2006-07-09T14:21:00.000-04:00

Well, I've been a combination of busy and unstable for the past week, which explains lack of post. Still, I have a few things to post about.

The first is that Will is coming home soon!!!!!!!!!!!!! =D =D =D =D. Because of orders from his commanding officer, he was "allowed" (err pressured) into taking his two weeks of vacation time on the eigth. Which means he'll probably hit the US on the 10th or 11th (stupid having to wait in Kuwait...). Still, he'll be coming home soon, so I'm so happy about that. I also hope that he brought back with him my copy of Dilbert and Invader Zim.

Indepence Day went by pretty well. My family, along with a some family friends, spent the night launching motar quality fireworks. A few of them exploded on ground level, which was both spectacular to watch and scary. There's a reason why they normaly explode in the air, and it might have something to do with public health. Except for the fact that a friend I invited (stupid coworker and her stupid other plans) didn't show up, it was a blast (hehe... pun not intended). Though we did the celebration on Monday the third and not the fourth.

Well, tomorrow will be my sisters Birthday (the 10th), and I got them some anti-virus software (yes, I know, I'm a geek). Still, that was one of the things they wanted. As I already stated, they're planning to spend their birthday at a hookah bar (tobacco only, I'm sure!). I hope them the best, and I hope they don't do anything stupid on their 18th.

To answer another question, as to playing Oblivian on my machine, well, here's my machine's specs: RAM 512, Video Nvidia Geforce FX5200 (128MB), Processor 3200 AMD Athlon X64. As you can see, I'd need a RAM and video card upgrade if I were to hope to play the game in its glory. Playing it in any manner that did not cast the game in a good light would be blasphemy against all that is good in the video game industry, something I'm not willing to do.

As for my dislike of Outlaw Star, well, I find the concept of Melee Space Combat to be completely laughable. I will sacrafice range and the ability to deliver explosive payloads to have the strategic advantage of being able to armwrestle my opponet's ship. Ya. That makes perfect sense. /sarcasm. There were other things about it I didn't like. I'm not a fan of a lot of combat in my anime. And I like to have good story, and good character development. And angst. I just really disliked it...

Anyway, I hope to post soon.